New York Giants Send Gift Package To Fan With Special Needs


Really heartwarming video and a class move by the Giants organization. Seeing an organization give back to it’s fans and  make a difference in one kid’s day, hell probably brightening up his entire week, really makes you feel good about rooting for a team. And as much as sports are a business and at the end of the day, we are essentially rooting for corporations, it’s a nice reminder that teams can have a human heart and give back to their communities. Enjoy your gifts, Michael.


PS-  Awesome move by Michael to immediately think to type a Thank You note. I always think “I should write a Thank You note” and then never do and put off doing it until it’s way too late and end up looking like an ungrateful jerk.


PPS- The best gift in that package is the Super Bowl DVD. I love that kind of stuff. I actually still watch Super Bowl 42 and Super Bowl 46 in their entireties once or twice a year. I also should probably pick up a hobby or something.

By charliewisco posted February 28th, 2015 at 2:09 PM

The Girl Scouts Cookie Oven Is The Best Idea I Have Heard In Years



Huffington Post- A new functional toy called the Girl Scouts Cookie Oven lets you make your own Girl Scouts cookies in the comfort of your own home. According to the Wicked Cool Toys press release, the oven will hit mass market retailers starting in Fall 2015. Cookie coveters will have the opportunity to bake classics like Thin Mints, Trefoils, Chocolate Peanut Butter, Coconut Caramel, Chocolate Chip, Sugar, Oatmeal and PB Sandwich.

The toy works similarly to an Easy Bake Oven, with a kid-safe heat source and a viewing window so bakers can watch their cookies rise. The oven retails for $59.99 and assorted retail packs range from $6.99 to $14.99. A standard box of Girl Scouts Cookies typically costs about $5, so consumers will have to decide if year-round cookie access is a worthy investment.


First we had Girl Scout Cookie flavored ice cream, then the ability to order Girl Scout Cookies online, and now this?  It seems like the Girl Scouts are just killing it in the 21st century.  I love this idea with all my heart.  The biggest problem with Girl Scout Cookies is that they only be bought at a certain time of the year and you need to know a girl scout in order to buy them.  But now you can just buy this oven and start pumping out Samoas by the baker’s dozen.

And while some people may find it childish or girly to own what amounts to an Easy Bake Oven, there is nothing childish or girly about blacking out from eating so many Girl Scout Cookies.  In fact, that could be considered the modern day American dream.  Plus, I have never had raw cookie dough for any of the Girl Scout Cookie flavors, but I bet it is somehow even better than chocolate chip cookie dough.  And don’t talk to me about salmonella or any diseases you can get from eating raw cookie dough.  That is false propaganda being served by women around the world that don’t want their boyfriends/husbands to get into the batter and truly enjoy life.

However, I noticed the Girl Scouts didn’t give any type of price break, charging $60 for an oven that is powered by a tiny light bulb and $7-15 per box of mix.  But I guess you can just bake the cookies for yourself and sell some extras on the side.  Undercut the living shit out of the scouts.  These girls need to learn just how ruthless life can be in the cutthroat business world. I still don’t understand why Tom Green’s Undercutters business failed, other than the crazy neighbor that wanted to kill him.


And just a brief reminder of the only correct Top 3 rankings for Girl Scout Cookies:


3. Thin Mints: The Kobe Bryant of Girl Scout cookies.  Both have been around forever and have a ton of fan fare.  But their reputations these days are better than their actual performance.  Putting Thin Mints in the freezer is like Kobe getting his blood doctored in Germany.  It helps for a short time, but they will never be the best again.


2. Tagalongs: These things are the clear #2 and are peanut buttery smooth like Kevin Durant.  But they miss that extra gear to put them over the top.


1. Samoas: Caramel, chocolate, and coconut on a cookie is the complete package.  Samoas are like LeBron James.  They are the best around and any debate trying to prove otherwise is just hating on the king.

By theclemreport posted February 28th, 2015 at 1:52 PM

Looks Like The Rangers Will Be Trading Zuccarello




Katie Strang of ESPN just tweeted that “As it currently stands, looks more like that Rangers F Mts Zuccarello will be traded than re-signed. Teams have been told that he’s available”. Katie Strang is an excellent reporter and a Rangers fan, so if she’s tweeting it, I’m going to assume it’s true. It looks like Zucc won’t be wearing blue by Monday.


Obviously, Rangers fans are going to take this hard. Zucc has developed great chemistry with the rest of the team, is a fan favorite, and has been playing awesome. But this is a business, Mats Zuccarello’s open-market value is more than the $3.5 million he’s getting paid this season, and the Rangers aren’t willing to put more than that into him. Either that, or they’re floating these rumors to bully him into a hometown discount at the end of the season. Plenty of teams are going to be interested in Zucc. He’s a great locker room presence, fantastic possession guy, and deadly goal scorer, especially when he goes on one of those little 5-game tears that he seems to every couple of months. I’ll miss seeing him zip around the ice like a remote-controlled race car and scrapping guys who are a full third-grader taller than him.


If the Rangers are trying to clear cap space at the end of this season however, it does fit nicely in with the Tyler Bozak rumors that have been circulating around Rangers twitter/the blogosphere. Trading Zucc gives the needed cap space to take on Bozak’s contract this year and the next, and allows you to slide Hayes back to the wing with Tyler at the dot. I’ve been waving the “Get Bozak” flag all year, so while I know some Rangers fans are hesitant about his advanced stats numbers in Toronto right now, I’d be excited to get him.


The one thing I don’t want to see happen is Zucc be traded as a rental to a contender who can bite us in the ass come playoff time. I’ve already had my heart ripped out by Marian Gaborik by seeing him hoist the Cup for the Kings last year and be their most valuable scorer (sorry, I’m going to step away from my laptop to vomit quickly).


And I don’t want to see that again. In a perfect world, Zucc would go to someone like the Florida Panthers trying to make a playoff push, or maybe as the start of a nucleus for a team on a rebuilding plan (Senators?). I guess we’ll find out in a few days. Fare thee well Zucc. You were an awesome and likable Ranger, and I wish you the best of luck in your future career. Definitely a round-of-applause guy for his next return to the Garden.


Now go get me my 2nd-line Center, Sather.


Follow me on twitter @CharlieWisco for tweets about the NHL Trade Deadline and House of Cards. Also, the Barstool Hockey Podcast is being recorded early next week, so send in any questions/thoughts you may have for that.

By charliewisco posted February 28th, 2015 at 11:37 AM

Alexey Shved Proved Last Night That He Is All About That #Knickstank Life With The Most Ridiculous Shot I Have Ever Seen


It is nice to see that the newest Knick was able to come in and get acquainted to New York’s tanking ways quickly.  That was like some sort of NBA2K15 glitch and it has left me mesmerized.  I have watched it about 500 times and I still don’t know what the hell Shved was thinking.  So I will tell myself that the shot was the Knicks’ declaration that they are going to tank harder than any team in the league, regardless of how embarrassing it may be.  The Knicks basically just pissed on the floor of Adam Silver and all the other tanking teams like A-Rod allegedly did to Cousin Yuri   The Knicks may have won the battle (last night’s game) but they will lose the war (probably go 2-23 the rest of the way in an effort to lock up the lottery).

And since today is just a shitty day for Knicks fans, lets go down memory lane to remember how we got to this point as a franchise.  From missing out on MVP candidates and legit stars to that Shved shot:

2006: 1st round pick traded to Chicago in Eddy Curry deal (which was used on LaMarcus Aldridge)



2007: 1st round pick swapped with Chicago in Eddy Curry deal (which was used on Joakim Noah)



2008: Just missed out on Russell Westbrook and Kevin Love for the Italian Cock



2009: Missed out on Stephen Curry by 1 pick for noted bum Jordan Hil



2010: Traded their 1st round pick in the Stephon Marbury abortion (which was later shipped to Utah and became Gordon Hayward, which was the pick before Paul George was selected)



That was the blogger version of the Eminem lyric:

Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
It’s like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me

By theclemreport posted February 28th, 2015 at 11:18 AM

Rest In Peace Anthony Mason




Damn, just terrible news this morning that Anthony Mason has passed away.  All the recent updates that had come out about big Mase was that he was slowly improving, so it’s hard not to be taken aback that he is gone just like that.  Like I said when he first went into the hospital, it was ironic that he had an issue with his heart, since Mason was a huge part of the heart of those 90s Knicks (which was a team basically built on heart and hustle).  I have some friends that would see Mase at St John’s games and said he was an awesome guy who loved hanging out and talking hoops with fans.  Obviously thoughts and prayers to all of Mason’s friends and family.  This news makes a really shitty Knicks season just that much worse.

Here are some memories of Mason playing during the glory days of the Knicks.  Man those teams were great.  Even though they never brought a title to New York, the city loved them.  And I mean LOVED them.  Knicks fans don’t have many happy memories to talk about, but once names like Mason, Oakley, Starks, Ewing, and Harper start getting thrown around, a twinkle appears in their eyes.  Having to deal with bandwagon Bulls fans in school was the worst, but representing a team that had guts and fought made it easier to do.  You knew you were getting every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears from every player on the roster. And Mase was at the top of that list.  Sure he was a bruiser, but Mason had great moves under the basket and even worked his way into becoming an All-Star point forward.  R.I.P. Big Man.

This scene from the 30 For 30 Winning Time stil gives me goosebumps.  Just a different breed of player than today’s NBA.


And of course, whenever you mention Anthony Mason, you have to talk about his hair.  He made shaving words and pictures in your head cool back in the 90s.  I remember the Garden would be buzzing about what new hairstyle Mason had.  Here are the Top 5 hair designs from Anthony Mason’s career:


5. In God’s Hands:  Mason said this was his favorite haircut in an interview with SI, so I had to put it on the list just because of that.  



4. Dogg Pound: Dogg was the word of the early-90s, with Death Row Records having a monopoly on hip hop. Try playing basketball against a guy with the words Dogg Pound shaved into his head and try not to be intimidated. You can’t.



3. New York Yankees Symbol: I may be a Yankees hater, but obviously their logo is iconic.  Being a Knick with that logo shaved into your head, as both teams were on the rise made Mason the coolest guy in New York.



2. Knicks And Number 14:  For my money, this was the most difficult haircut to pull off.  The Knicks letters kind of curved like the logo, and adding the number 14 inside was a nice little touch.  



1. M*A*S*E:  Getting your own nickname shaved into your head as you played enforcer for the 90s Knicks made Mason the baddest man on the planet in many peoples’ eyes (mine included).  



I think it would be pretty cool if some NBA players shaved something into their head in honor of Mason this weekend.  I wrote M*A*S*E in my head, but I am just some random blogger with limited visibility.  Hopefully someone (preferably in the Knicks franchise) decides to represent the fallen Mase one way or another.



By theclemreport posted February 28th, 2015 at 10:01 AM

Gallery Of The Sexiest White And Gold Takes You Into The Weekend

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Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go beat my dick until its black and blue

By KFC posted February 27th, 2015 at 5:00 PM

Chick Vomits And Shits Her Pants During 50 Shades Of Grey

Screen Shot 2015-02-27 at 11.30.33 AM

MTV – Movie fans got more than they bargained for at a screening of Fifty Shades of Grey - when a woman lost control of her bodily functions. The unlucky lady – who has not been named to spare her shame – had apparently been drinking before heading to the cinema in Milton Keynes and started vomiting during the movie – before things got worse. Much, much worse.  ”We all expected to see Christian Grey gag Anastasia as part of the plot. We certainly didn’t expect to be gagging ourselves because of the stench,” a pun-loving cinemagoer told local paper the Milton Keynes Citizen. ”She lost control of everything, including all bodily fluids. The whole cinema stank.” And paramedics were reportedly called to assist the unfortunate individual. ”I’m not sure of her age but she was so drunk she couldn’t move,” the witness continued. ”She practically had to be carried out. And the mess she left behind was just disgusting. ”There was no way they could clean it up there and then – it would be a specialist job, so the film was stopped and everybody had to leave. ”It was so disappointing. We’d really been looking forward to seeing it after reading the books.”We just hope those poor film fans have been offered counselling after their ordeal.

Well that will ruin your precious movie experience pretty damn quick. Please turn off all cell phones and also dont shit yourself and puke all over the place. We thank you for your courtesy!

I love how this story is trying to ride the 50 Shades of Grey wave. Like there was the story about the chick who was caught masturbating during 50 Shades and that made sense. The headline was grabbing people because it was the most talked about movie and a chick masturbating during a film about BDSM sex is a perfect fit. But this bitch. This poopy pants bitch. Something tells me this calamity of a human was gonna shit herself and puke everywhere if she was seeing Sponge Bob, Hot Tub Time Machine 2, or 50 Shades Of Grey. The headline really should just be “Drunk Woman Poops Her Pants At The Movie Theater.” Lets not give all the credit to 50 Shades. They’ve gotten enough pub the past month. They dont need to get a shout out for the shitfaced lady who cleared out a whole theater of people with her bodily excrement.

PS – Laugh out loud funny to think about a whole theater slowly one by one catching the waft of poop and vomit. Like a game of telephone it just trickles through the seats one by one until everyone is horrified. Send in the Department of Health in the hazmat suits. Movie’s over folks.

By KFC posted February 27th, 2015 at 4:10 PM

Turn 25 Cents Into $10,000 With Draft Kings NBA Arcade Challenge

Screen Shot 2015-02-27 at 1.02.24 PM

Screen Shot 2015-02-27 at 1.02.35 PM


+ DraftKings =



Screen Shot 2015-02-27 at 1.04.10 PM


Stop what you’re doing right. Flip the cushions on your couch, or dig around the cup holders in your car, or take your change out of your piggy bank, and give yourself a chance to turn 25 cents into $10,000. Why would you not? Its just an opportunity to win free money. Making a profit of $9,999.25 seems pretty awesome to me. Just put 5 bucks in an account, play this challenge for a quarter, draft 8 guys and make Friday night hoops that much more enjoyable.


By KFC posted February 27th, 2015 at 3:20 PM
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