Tour Dates

  • District N9NE
    Philadelphia, PA

    April 25th, 2014 9:00 PM
  • Irving Plaza
    New York City, NY

    April 26th, 2014 9:00 PM
  • Toad's Place
    New Haven, CT

    January 30th, 2014 9:00 PM
  • Lupo's
    Providence, RI

    January 31st, 2014 9:00 PM
  • Webster Theater
    Hartford, CT

    February 21st, 2014 9:00 PM
  • The Palladium
    Worcester, MA

    February 22nd, 2014 9:00 PM
  • Sherman Theater
    East Stroudsburg, PA

    March 1st, 2014 9:00 PM
  • The Union Bar
    Iowa City, IA

    March 8th, 2014 6:00 PM
  • The Boulder Theater
    Boulder, CO

    March 15th, 2014 9:00 PM
  • The Fillmore
    Charlotte, NC

    April 4th, 2014 10:00 PM
  • House Of Blues
    Myrtle Beach, SC

    April 5th, 2014 9:00 PM

Its Comedy Hour For Michael Kay And The Yankees Broadcast

Its almost like Michael Kay and, really, the entire Yankees organization intentionally does everything in their power to make me hate them. I guess the 27 rings makes up for a lot but other than that rooting for this franchise is the fucking worst.

By KFC posted April 16th, 2014 at 9:58 PM

Barstool NYC Local Smokeshow Of The Day – Erin

 

Introducing Erin from New York, NY.  Absolute perfect way to end this cold ass Wednesday.  Maybe some of the most seductive eyes this site has ever seen.

 

Blackout New York City At Irving Plaza is coming to town.  All past/present smokeshows get free tickets.  Email beardobarstool@gmail.com to nominate a smoke.

GET TICKETS HERE

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By beardo posted April 16th, 2014 at 5:29 PM

Dude Who Avoided 13 Year Prison Sentence On Clerical Error Gets Caught, Awaits His Fate

Screen Shot 2014-04-16 at 12.05.46 PM

Today ShowA Missouri man who avoided a 13-year jail sentence because of what state officials called a clerical error will learn Tuesday if he will have to keep fighting to avoid being incarcerated. In 1999, Cornealious “Mike” Anderson was convicted of armed robbery after taking money from a Burger King manager who was making a bank deposit. He was sentenced to 13 years in jail, but after he posted bond and went home during the appeals process, he was never forced to serve his sentence. ”He then waited and waited and waited for the Missouri Department of Corrections to give him a date to surrender and begin his serving his sentence,’’ Anderson’s attorney, Patrick Michael Megaro, told TODAY. “That day never came.” The state mistakenly believed Anderson was already in prison serving his sentence, when in fact he was living life on the outside. ”He got married, had children, opened a successful business, coached youth football, (and) joined a church group,’’ Magaro said in a report from NBC’s Joe Fryer. “Did everything that you would expect a normal person to do because in his mind, he believed that maybe the courts had changed their mind.”  However, just as his sentence would have ended last summer, authorities realized the apparent clerical error — and that Anderson had never served time. The father of four was arrested and currently sits behind bars, waiting for Missouri Attorney General Chris Koster to respond on Tuesday to a petition from his attorney asking for his release. Koster declined comment to TODAY. “It’s just very hard,’’ said Anderson’s wife, LaQonna Anderson. “And I miss my husband very, very much. My kids miss their father.” Anderson spoke with the radio program “This American Life” about his predicament. “I never felt like a fugitive, because a fugitive’s someone that’s running from the law,’’ he said. “I never ran from the law. I was there.” The manager who was robbed believes that Anderson should be set free. “It’s their fault, so I mean it’s like they’re going to try and penalize him for another 13 years,’’ said the man, identified only by his first name, Dennis, on the radio program. “That don’t seem right.”

This is like when you’re a kid in school you didn’t do your homework and there’s like 5 minutes left in class and the teacher still hasn’t collected the assignment. And you’re sitting there praying the next 5 minutes go faster and you get away with it Scot Free. The only difference here is that instead of just getting away with not doing homework in 5th grade we’re talking about going to Federal Pound Me In The Ass Prison for 13 years. Of course the teacher always remembers at the last second and of course the court system aways catches their clerical glich. The question is just how bad will they fuck this guy?

I say he’s a free man. Its their fault. Its like when a store accidentally mislabels the price on something and so they have to give it to you for that cost. I’m not sure if thats actually a rule but once when I was a kid I found a Jason Kidd Mavericks jersey that was accidentally labeled $15 so they had to give it to me for that price. I was over the moon even though that jersey fucking sucked. Thats the same logic here. Its not my fault your prison secretary screwed up. My sentence was supposed to be from 1999 to 2012. That was your window to put me in jail. You never came to get me. You fucked that up. Thats on you. Statute of Limitations or some shit.

By KFC posted April 16th, 2014 at 5:00 PM

That Is How You Let Your Money Work For You

tanaka

Now that right there is a fucking stat line you spend $175mil on. It may be the first month of the first year of this contract, and this game may have just been against the Cubs but this has to get you excited if you are at Yankee fan. He keeps this up and I’ll love him long time.  Now we need Pineda to go out and do some work tonight to keep this push going to flip the rotation by season’s end.

Oh yea, Beltran went deep again and was the AL Player of The Week last week? I would lock myself in my room too if I was KFC.


By jj posted April 16th, 2014 at 4:28 PM

Another Year Of Lundqvist Playoff Hate Has Got Me All Emotional

Phoenix Coyotes v New York Rangers

I can’t take it. I know some of the “choke artist” talk about Lundqvist is simple rivalry trolling – but there’s plenty of casual fans who just assume it’s true. You motherfuckers are getting me all emotional. I feel like TO when he cried while defending Tony Romo. *sniffle* That’s my goalie… *sniffle* *tear* Does Hank have any rings to show off yet? Nope. That sure as shit has nothing to do with his individual playoff performances.

His numbers speak for themselves. Out of all goalies in the history of the league with 50+ postseason appearances, Lundqvist ranks 6th in save percentage. 11th in goals-against. ALL-TIME. He’s played 4 Game 7′s and won his last 3 by surrendering 1 or less in each. His lone loss was in ’09 by a 2-1 score. Last year, with the Rangers down 3 games to 2, he reeled off back-to-back shutouts against Ovechkin’s Capitals to advance. Against the Bruins, his Blueshirts could only muster 6 goals in their 4 losses – spoiling a pair of opportunities where Hank allowed just two past him.

Two years ago, he was the biggest reason the Rangers met the Devils in the Conference Finals. In the two prior series, both of which went to 7 games, Lundqvist allowed more than 2 just four times. Never more than 3. That includes the quadruple-OT game against the Caps where he was beaten only once. After shutting out NJ in two of the first 3 games in the Finals, it’s at least understandable he broke down at the end. Carrying an entire NHL franchise every other day for over a month can do that. No excuses, I get it – but again, without standing on his head against OTT & WAS, the Blueshirts don’t even make it out of the first round. In ’10-’11, he got less than 2 goals support. That’s how you lose a series in 5 despite a 2.26 goals-against.

Bottom line – he’s far from a “choke artist” come playoffs. He’s not Marc-Andre Fleury (I know he’s won a Cup, but outside of two big games vs Detroit he’s been awful) or Roberto Luongo. *sniffle* He’s my goalie… *sniffle* *tear* and his time will come.

Check out KFC Radio’s Stanley Cup playoffs podcast hosted by @CharlieWisco with Rear Admiral, myself & Chief.

CLICK HERE TO BUY

NYR

By 610 posted April 16th, 2014 at 4:10 PM

Jets Sign Chris Johnson To A 2 Year Deal

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We’ll wait to see the guaranteed money, since that really decides whether this is a good or bad deal. But on the field, its a solid move by Idzik. Its not 2009 and Chris Johnson ain’t gonna give you 2000 yards. But hes a durable thousand yard rusher who plays virtually every game every year. Nobody from the Ivory, Powell, Goodson mess in the backfield ever really took control of the running game, so I see no reason to bring in a low risk, high reward, durable veteran like CJ.

Sometimes the best moves aren’t the sexiest ones

PS – If this was Madden and not real life Vick anc CJ2k would win us a Super Bowl. But alas, this is real life. Fuck.

By KFC posted April 16th, 2014 at 3:27 PM

NYC Looking To Lower Taxi Speeds With New Technology

Sikh Taxi Driver

 

Post - The city is looking at new anti-speeding technologies that can be installed in cabs.  The Taxi and Limousine Commission is considering speed governors, which can limit the top speed of a car through electronic sensors and engine computers, as part of Mayor de Blasio’s “Vision Zero” plan to end traffic deaths in ten years. The Commission is also looking at systems that could alert cabbies they exceed the speed limit or are driving recklessly, and can even detect driver fatigue, according to a request for information released Tuesday.Any technology installed in cabs would be voluntary and part of a pilot program. The request for information seeks input on such technology from the public, safety experts, and equipment providers by April 25 on whether they reduce crashes, are reliable and accurate, and any challenges with using them.

 

First off I’d like to say that de Blasio sucks.  Been in office over 100 days now and all I know is his son has a giant afro, he LOVES pre school, and is a big pussy.  I get he’s trying to cut down on the pedestrian deaths, and that’s okay considering the amount of non murder/drug related deaths a day in the city is outrageous.  Every single day there are 10 stories of people dying by falling off buildings, jumping off buildings, run over on crosswalks and hit by trains.  But putting a governor in my taxi ain’t the way to stop it.  I want my cab to get me car sick.  I want the driver screaming pure gibberish in strange languages while spilling curried goat meat on every corner.  I want 4-5 near death collisions.  I want a blue tooth in both fucking ears.  I want to hit every light up 10th and get to the UWS in 4 minutes because “John” from Queens has a mean case of diarrhea, road rage, and general hatred towards white kids in Brooks Brothers polo’s who don’t use the train on weekends.

By beardo posted April 16th, 2014 at 2:50 PM

New “I’m Keith Hernandez” Shirts Now On Sale

HERNANDEZ

 

CLICK HERE TO BUY

I’m absolutely furious at myself. Livid. This should have been the first fucking thing I did when I started Barstool New York. Get some I’m Keith Hernandez shirts up on sale. The man is an absolute sports icon. A Seinfeld legend. He deserves to be immortalized by Barstool maybe more than anybody who’s ever been on a shirt.

Well today after the hot dog video and the Keith bobblehead at Seinfeld night for Cyclones, the light bulb finally went off. Every Mets fan, every Seinfeld fan, and every fan of iconic athletes on and off the field will want this shirt. Get em now while they’re available.

CLICK HERE TO BUY

By KFC posted April 16th, 2014 at 2:00 PM
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