Couldn't be more confident going into Friday.
I’m not sure what to blog that I didn’t write yesterday. Rangers are a better team on the road? They’re gonna continue to dictate the pace of the game while Philly tried to goon it up? I even tweeted that Mason was gonna get some run. So color me not surprised with a 4-1 W. To his credit though, Wayne Simmonds wasn’t bullshitting about escalating the “chippiness”. After the Blueshirts jumped out to an early lead, he cross-checked Dorsett in the teeth for one of two power plays he was responsible for. Voracek somehow got only a roughing minor for what was basically domestic violence on pretty little Hags, and the refs missed a blatant cheap shot to Carcillo’s jaw. Then they banged him for a phantom hook on a great defensive play. No big deal though. All he did after stepping out of the sin bin was take everything orange and wipe his ass with it. I think it was Rasheed Wallace who said it best – “puck don’t lie”.
Chalk up a point for AV. If Jesper Fast was only gonna play 8-9 minutes anyway, he rightfully figured they’d get more out of those minutes from Carcillo. The knockout goal, +2, a pair of penalties – he definitely put his stamp all over the game. As for the rest of the squad, it was a great defensive effort. The Rangers hit Philly with a little Torts action, blocking 28 pucks in front of Hank who stopped 31 of 32. Marty St. Louis had a hand in their first goal and netted the game-winner which is a great sign – and if it wasn’t for Benoit Pouliot being the best Flyer on the ice in the first period negating a pair of PP’s, this game could’ve been even more lopsided. Couldn’t be more confident going into Friday & am looking forward to being at MSG to wrap up the series Sunday.
Next on the bulletin board – Claude “I’ve Got 2 Shots & 0 Goals All Series” Giroux:
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They put drugs in there, they can put guns in there, I wouldn't be surprised if chicks can put a goddam coat rack up in there like Mary Poppins' bag.
APRIL 22--A 19-year-old Tennessee woman had a loaded handgun hidden in her vagina when she was brought into jail yesterday afternoon following a collar for driving with a suspended license, police report. As Dallas Archer was being booked into the Kingsport jail, a female corrections officer alerted to an “unknown object” in the teenager’s crotch during a search. The jailer and a female cop then accompanied Archer to a bathroom for further examination, a review that led to the recovery of a “North American Arms 22 LR revolver (loaded) which Ms. Dallas had concealed in her vagina,” according to a Kingsport Police Department report. A subsequent check revealed that the five-shot mini-revolver–which is four inches in length–had been “stolen from an auto burglary in 2013.” The handgun, which police valued at $250, is owned by John Souther, a 70-year-old retired car salesman. In a TSG interview, Souther said that the gun was taken from his 1994 Mustang, which was “ransacked” last year while parked in his Kingsport carport. Souther said that police told him that the revolver had been recovered, but offered no further details. When told where the gun had been stashed, Souther said, “Oh, gosh.” He noted that he would eventually like “the little fellow” returned, but added that the weapon would require “a bath in bleach.” Archer, seen in the above mug shot, was charged with gun possession and introducing contraband into a penal facility. According to a jail official, Archer was released from custody after posting $6000 bond.
Ahh the Vagina. Perhaps life’s biggest mystery. Its an entryway for penises, an exit ramp for human babies. Its just an open hole on the female body. It bleeds randomly. It can literally control the world when utilized properly. Empires have crumbled at the hands of the vagina.
So there’s literally nothing that a pussy can do that will surprise me anymore. They put drugs in there, they can put guns in there, I wouldn’t be surprised if chicks can put a goddam coat rack up in there like Mary Poppins’ bag. With kegel exercises and shit I’m convinced a vagina could actually eat me whole if it wanted to. Like those giant man eating flowers from Jumanji. I bet if this chick put her mind to it, she could have pulled the trigger with her pussy too. Not just smuggle the gun in there, but actually turn her pussy into a firearm like some sort of turret gun. Who knows, man. That thing will always be a mystery to me.
Ordinarily you could just chalk this up to Philly Being Philly. Classless mongoloids doing what they do best after getting smoked in the playoffs. But not tonight. Not knowing that Matt Harvey is a diehard Rangers fan: @KFCBarstool #Harveying has spread to the NHL Playoffs #Rangers #Flyers pic.twitter.com/rBCSObLu8M — Joseph Buono (@JBuono611) April 23, [...]
Ordinarily you could just chalk this up to Philly Being Philly. Classless mongoloids doing what they do best after getting smoked in the playoffs. But not tonight. Not knowing that Matt Harvey is a diehard Rangers fan:
The stars aligned on this one. And I’ll give credit where credit is due, this win goes to this guy:
There was also a Flyers fan who tried to join in with #Harveying movement with a picture in a Fly or Die shirt but he deleted it like a puss. Pretty sure he jinxed the whole thing for Philadelphia. Second star to St. Louis and third star to Nash but first star belongs to Harvey
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You go 7.1 inning without walking anyone and only giving up 2 runs during your first start in Fenway and I’ll wear whatever you wear. Tanaka could show up next start in a fucking dress and I’m cool with it as long as he pitches like this. Normally I wouldn’t be cool with my pitcher [...]
You go 7.1 inning without walking anyone and only giving up 2 runs during your first start in Fenway and I’ll wear whatever you wear. Tanaka could show up next start in a fucking dress and I’m cool with it as long as he pitches like this. Normally I wouldn’t be cool with my pitcher carrying a purse cause I never understand the Asians I see on the subway, but I’m about to head to Canal St. and buy one off Tanaka’s cousin right now.
Tanaka is so hot right now he could take a crap, wrap it in tinfoil, put a couple fish hooks on it and sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.
Oh yeah this has to hurt…
Harvey 3:16 says Fuck You!
Hey Jay Horwitz…hey Sandy Alderson…hey Jeff Wilpon…Harvey 3:16 says Fuck You! Because it’s absolutely ridiculous in the year 2014 for a grown man to be chastised for taking a picture flipping the bird, we here at Barstool New York are Team Harvey.
Introducing Christiana from Syracuse. Another day, another smoke from Cuse. Christiana and her friends just won free tickets to any Blackout show we have. Blackout New York City At Irving Plaza is THIS WEEKEND. All past/present smokeshows get free tickets. Email firstname.lastname@example.org to claim your tickets or nominate a smokeshow. GET TICKETS HERE
Introducing Christiana from Syracuse. Another day, another smoke from Cuse. Christiana and her friends just won free tickets to any Blackout show we have.
Blackout New York City At Irving Plaza is THIS WEEKEND. All past/present smokeshows get free tickets. Email email@example.com to claim your tickets or nominate a smokeshow.
GET TICKETS HERE
Get as chippy as you want.
Look for Carcillo in the lineup for Fast tonight.
Brady Simmonds. Get as chippy as you want. Keep giving the Blueshirts 6 power plays a game while, to their credit, they remain disciplined without getting bent over like the soft bitches Philly thought they’d be. Well, almost…
Despite the series being deadlocked, it’s obvious that the Rangers have been playing better hockey. For some reason, they let off the accelerator & allowed the Flyers a little false confidence. That’s fine. If Simmonds thinks putting on the foil is what his squad needs to do to take the series, so be it. For a team not celebrated for their offense, the Blueshirts are the 3rd-highest scoring road team in the Eastern bracket. No one in the East has given up less away from home – even the mighty Bruins. And I’ll give you all one guess who’s allowed the 2nd-most in their own building. So once NY builds a big enough lead and turns the Philly faithful back into the miserable turds they are, then maybe the teams can iron out their “chippiness”…
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