NEW YORK (CBSNewYork) - Yankees fans received good news last week when they announced that right-handed starting pitcher Hiroki Kuroda was returning to the Bronx for one more year. More good news could be on the way shortly. Left-hander Andy Pettitte will likely announce in the coming days that he will return to the Yankees for the 2013 season, WFAN’s Jon Heyman reported. The 40-year-old is expected to sign a contract worth slightly over $11 million, Heyman said. Legendary closer Mariano Rivera is also expected to sign with the Yankees within the next few days, Heyman reported. The 42-year-old told general manager Brian Cashman that he would return earlier in the offseason, but a contract was never finalized.

Would you just fucking DIE ALREADY? Both of you. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t watch another year of these geriatric assholes. Its not even like I’m afraid they are gonna lead the Yankees to the World Series or anything like that. I just can’t stand to watch another season of Pettitte trotting out there throwing 6 1/3 of 3 run ball. I can’t stand to watch him do that dramatic stare-over-the-glove-under-the-brim. I can’t stand watching that big sweeping breaking ball landing for a called third strike. Another year of loading the bases every other inning but always making the pitch to get the inning ending double play. I’m done watching Mariano throw 7 pitches and walking off the mound like he doesn’t even give a fuck anymore.

You guys already have all the money in the world. You’ve probably already fucked all the women your dick can handle. Just stop doing steroids and fucking retire. I’ve grown tired of hating you guys. Let someone else get a turn.