Asshole Hipster Legally Named “Beautiful Existence” Vows To Only Eat and Drink At Starbucks For An Entire Year
MSN – A lot of folks like to begin their day with a quick stop at Starbucks for a cup of morning joe, but one Seattle woman is planning to make more stops than anyone else. The woman, whose legal name is Beautiful Existence, will be eating food and drinking beverages in 2013 only from the global coffeehouse. It’s not a publicity stunt on behalf of the company, and she’s not being paid. Miss Existence just likes to set yearlong challenges for herself: In 2011, for example, she shopped only at Goodwill. She plans to blog about her experience, which presumably will include tales of staff spelling her name wrong on her cup and forgetting that extra shot of espresso.
We’re 10 days into 2013. We’ve got 355 days left. And I’ve already found the worst bitch of the year. Technically Christina Gonzalaz The Subway Disgrace was 2012, so she’s not eligible for the title of “Person KFC Wants To Kill With His Bare Hands In 2013.” Although she may just be the worst human being of all time. But this broad Beautiful Existence ain’t far behind. Give me one redeeming quality about this girl. You can’t do it. She’s ugly, she’e a hipster, she’s from Seattle and she’s an attention whore. Thats like the top 4 things on my list to decide whether or not I hate you. Oh and she dressed in homeless people’s clothes all of 2011. Thats not officially on my list but lets just say its not helping your cause if you’re already 0 for 4. She’s like a new age hipster version of “It’s Pat.” Look at me, look at me! You can’t tell if I have a dick or a vagina! Look at me, look at me! I changed my name to something unorthodox! Look at me, Look at me! I’m only gonna eat Starbucks while I wear dirty bed bug clothing from the Salvation Army! I’m gonna go around burning down every Starbucks in Seattle. That’ll end your precious little Beautiful Existence pretty damn quick.
she is an ugly bitch..
this is like a more twisted fucked up stupid cunt version of “supersize me”… some brazen barista needs to give this chick an enema with steamed milk to teach her a lesson
but what about when she eats the fish??
Fuck twat
cool yeah be a hipster with a hipster name, but give your money only to one of the largest corporations in the world. Smart
so she spends 2011 wearing homeless people clothes, and now she will spend all of 2013 doing the exact opposite and only eating/drinking at the biggest fucking ripoff breakfast joint that has only subpar food options. I hope she dies while going broke.
this line: “its not a publicity stunt on behalf of the company, and she’s not being paid. Miss Existence just likes to set yearlong challenges for herself”
should say: starbucks has nothing to do with the publicity stunt, Miss Existence just likes to have minor national attention for doing things which merit absolutely no congratulations or applause because she’s a completely attention craving hipster
i hope her next year long commitment is attempting suicide.
I loathe Starbucks
I’d hit that (with a flaming bicycle chain, that is)
she’s either going to die from choking on the driest scone ever or just shit to death from that gross coffee….either way she should die from this
KO barstool?
I think you mean evil asshole hipster.
Frothy lattes clearly make her farty and bloated
And somewhere, her dad cries into his pillow as his daughter exhausts her trust fund being a fucking hipster while getting dyked out by an even worse looking hipster.
I seriously think I’d have an easier time dealing with a kid that turns out to be a fruit than one who turns into one of these occupy morons.
absolutely presmoobs, if my kid is one of these hipsters who fleeces the system and gets a kickstarter to pay him 4 billion dollars to open up a Shoney’s, I will be proud of him because he got that money, but I will secretly hate him
I’ve decided that pretty much anyone who ‘blogs’ is a homo.
I hope he or she dies from high cholesterol as a result of only eating/drinking unhealthy shit from Starbucks.
And to parents out there: This thing is the portrait of “parenting failure.”
I hope your vanilla bean latte is sub par
I don’t get it? and whats with the Jean Jacket?
more misleading name – this bitch or metta world peace?
Does this look like the face of some bitch who only drank and ate Starbucks for a year and died promptly???
Does un-natural hair dye color make you mental? I’d give her a Cincinati Bow-tie or maybe an Angry Dragon.
This goat mouthed slampig definitely wears underwear with dick holes. I hope she chokes on a bag of dicks while sipping her latte and “vibing out” to the Lumineers.
Good luck with that fatty
may her coffee fall and burn her lap every Monday morning
‘she plans to blog about the experience’.
This just in…NO ONE FUCKING CARES.
This squishy cunt is a prime example of why giving kids trophys for last place never telling a kid “no,” and not giving them a backhand when they do something retarded is the reason why there are so many fucktards like this bitch running around. I hope she has a heart attack from all that diarrhea flavored coffee.
I’d rather blast her in the face with an AR-15.
I feel worse for this chick starbucks fucking sucks
Cunt.
She should change her name to “Hideous Waste-of-Oxygen”