Best Barstool New York Comments Of The Week
Its another new Friday feature here on Barstool New York. This time we’re paying homage to the demented retards in the comments section. For the most part the comments section has devolved into a lame string of people complaining about us giving away free shit, advertisements, or babbling about which writers they like and don’t like. Pointless shit. But there’s always a few comments here and there from the funny Stoolies that actually add to the quality of the blog. Here’s a handful of the best from this week:
#5 - Brazilian Chick Posions Her Pussy To Kill Her Husband When He Goes Down On Her – Commenter: GetAtMe23 - “If it doesn’t taste like a roll of quarters, it’s poisoned.” Just spot on. It tastes like quarters.
#4 - 29 Year Old Woman Refuses To have Sex Ever Again - Commenter – herbie versmells – “she looks like she went to the plastic surgeon and said “doc, make me ugly enough so not even the barstool sports greaseballs would want to have sex with me” and he did an excellent job” Thats the harshest description of an ugly girl I’ve ever seen.
#3 - NYPD Cannibal Cop Blames Trying To Murder And Eat 100 Women On Cameron Diaz For Her Role In The Mask - Commenter – BearDown34 – “Cameron Diaz was my first boner too. Nearly split at the tip like a hotdog thats been in the microwave too long..” The imagery there is just amazing.
#2 – Top 5 Reasons Men Get Married - Commenter – TigersHoPatrol - “Bravo! My shit bag wife left almost a year and I’ve never been happier. Lap dances, guitars, trips, sex with different girls. Single is WAY better than being married.” 2 things – 1) Calling your wife a shitbag is hilarious. Its not fancy, just right to the point. 2) “Guitars” absolutely slayed me. I don’t even understand the context. This dude now just has free reign to buy lap dances and as many guitars as he wants.
#1 – Dan Marino Secretly Knocked Up A Chick In 2005 - Commenter – DoctorJac – “He gave her the old Roger Pedactor” Unreal Ace Ventura reference. I will undoubtedly be saying “give her the old Roger Pedactor” from now on anytime anything sexual with a chick happens.
Tune in next week for the top 5 that Stoolies have to offer.
come on man, there’s gotta be funnier comments.
You forgot Blackdude.
This gives us something to strive for. Brilliant idea
KFC, after that 90s chick blog you were flying high…and you give us this weaksauce
We must not be very funny because those really sucked.
herbie versmells is usually a huge doucher but every now and then he knocks a comment out of the park like this one hahaha
Where’s Gaystoolie been he wins the comment section everytime
Roger Pedactor is solid gold.
I have now found a new weekly goal.
Clancys cry for mercy…pathetic, dude.
This is a great way to get your pageviews up too…thats why pres hired you, for your business smarts.
I remember when Jenna Marbles did this on Stoollala
Such a Jew move u dumb Irish drunk don’t let that filthy Jew slavemaster own u Kline this ur better than him don’t be a slave to the Jew and his money Traditionally Jews were the slaves of course that is until they created the modern economic system and made us all slaves Wake up and revolt Kill the Jew kill the Jew. kill the Jew
All the funny comments are either racist or about barstool girlfriends/wives.
That “magazine” cover boy is Feits with Pres’ bodyfat
I love the three articles featured in red on the Magazine cover.
throw the jew down the well gargles man chowder
I’m with bronamath on this one. Gives me something to strive for now.
I think the BearDown34 one is the best.
” For the most part the comments section has devolved into a lame string of people complaining about us giving away free shit, advertisements, or babbling about which writers they like and don’t like. Pointless shit. ” – its called feedback KFC. most companies like feedback because it tells them what they’re doing right and where they need to improve. i cant think of a company ever complaining over feedback until now. feitelberg & neil must have had their feelings hurt one too many times so they need you to come in and save the day for them.
shocked ‘throw the jew down the well’ didnt win for his always insightful and always rational comments.
You should probably just make it top 5 fietelburg jokes of the week. Those are always gold. Plus Portnoy doesn’t vote them down like he doesn’t first lady jokes.
this was actually funny you guys are retarded
Throw the Jew down the well, what’s your take on Israel’s recent airstrike in Syria? Fan or not fan?
@joe forte. Lighten up you fuckin’ ham sandwich. Get some sand in your vagina today?
I wish that was a real magazine.
This segment has given meaning to my life.
I think this is a great. Like masturbation.
Makes me wish I had a less gay name now…
joe forte must be a blast to hang out with.
forte after your nonsense rant yesterday I think its best if you take a few days off bud
hey joe u need to relax u schmuck.
i hope my life doesn’t come to the point where I’m complaining and begging to a blogger about how funny my comments are and that i need recognition because my parents didn’t love me as a child
I wonder if this will be a good thing for the comment section or not… I get the feeling people are going to try way too hard