Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie Have A $40,000 Sex Dungeon In France
Hindustan Times – Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have just splashed 25,000 pounds to convert an old fisherman’s cottage, in the grounds of their estate in the South of France, into their own sex grotto. According to a source, as well as being sound-proofed, it’s got a bed, a sex swing with stirrups and a chest full of goodies. “They disappear down there, telling their kids they’re going out for some fresh air,” the Sun quoted the source as saying. “Brad comes back looking like the cat that got the cream and they are giggly for the rest of the day,” the source added.
Brad and Angelina are doing it right. Minus adopting a zillion Africans. Thats doing it very very wrong. But aside from that I love their style. Met on the set of Mr. and Mrs. Smith and just decided to say fuck it. Break up a marriage and just start banging each other regardless of what people thought. And are they even married yet? No right? Its like they aren’t really married, don’t have any real kids, just keep amassing an army of Kony Kids, and fuck each other into bolivian inside their 40 thousand dollar sex shack. Swinging from the ceiling, fucking with machines, and punishing each other inside a vault of perverted heaven. Turning their lives into their own personal porno. Can’t knock that hustle.
PS – If you don’t think “The cat that got the cream” is my new go-to phrase you are outside of your mind. That will be on Barstool New York no less than 1,000 times this year.
I can’t wait until one of their kids walks in on them in that place.
Sounds like Angelina’s the one getting that cream
Life is so much easier when you have nannies do the heavy lifting… leave lots of time for fucking.
Brad Pitt is a infamous stoner, I bet he has an pound of prime shit ground up and ready to go.
When I saw the headline my first reaction was “this is ridiculous” but then I saw your source was the Hindustan Times. Must be true.
Please, for the love of God, don’t tell me that you’re so fucking illiterate that you said “fuck each other into bolivian.” IT’S INTO OBLIVION. READ A FUCKING BOOK.
I’d prefer to read “cat that got the cream” 1,000,000x than hear you continue on about how much you hate the yankees but continue and continue and continue and continue to tweet and write about everything they do. The actual tweeting and writing doesn’t bother me at all– what bothers the shit out of me is that you won’t admit that you actually like them. Too much false pride as a mets fan to admit that it’s actually ok to root for another ny team.
Laxplaya, take a lap. Come back next week.
laxplaya, a little late to the party eh? I get the feeling that Angelina just has to keep pushing the boundaries, one day we are going to wake up to a story about them shooting each other during those weird gun play sex games people in trailer parks do. I mean i guess it gets to a point where being tied down and shoving mechanical instruments into your holes just doesnt cut it anymore.
What book should I read to learn about “into oblivion?”