Chelsea Chef Serving His Wife’s Breast Milk

NY Post - This Chelsea restaurant has gone from brasserie to brassiere. Chef Daniel Angerer is letting diners at Klee Brasserie munch on cheese made from his wife’s breast milk. “It tastes like cow’s-milk cheese, kind of sweet,” he told The Post. The flavor depends on what the cheese is served with — Angerer recommends a Riesling — and “what the mother eats,” said Angerer, who once bested Bobby Flay on TV’s “Iron Chef.” Breast milk doesn’t curdle well due to its low protein content, so a little moo juice has to be added to round out the texture, Angerer said. After blogging about his efforts with the human cheese, customers started demanding a sample, he said. “The phone was ringing off the hook,” the chef said. “So I prepared a little canapé of breast-milk cheese with figs and Hungarian pepper.” The response has been generally positive from those who’ve tried the cheese, although many customers are too squeamish to attempt it. “I think a lot of the criticism has to do with the combination of sex and cheese, but . . . the breast is there to make food,” said Lori Mason, the chef’s wife.

There is NOTHING worse than High Horse Food Guy who thinks you need to expand the horizons of your palate.  If it were up to me, I’d eat a cheesesteak and an Entenmann’s Chocolate Donut for dinner every night. And guess what? It is up to me, so that’s basically what I eat every day. But then I got some snotty bastards looking down their nose at me like I’m some uncivilized brute.  Hey dude, just because I don’t wanna drink your wife’s titty milk doesn’t mean I’m not cultured.  There are about 150,000 other reasons why I’m not cultured, but not liking human breast milk ain’t one of em. Also, equally as annoying as that guy is High Horse Beer Guy who insists you drink some Double IPA microbrew infused with extra hops and fermented in some blah blah blah. Just give me a Bud Light dude. The difference is, the Beer Guy isn’t trying to get me to eat some disgusting sphere of boob cheese.

But like I said, I’m about as far on the other side of the spectrum as you can possibly be. My favorite sort of cheese is Kraft Singles in the plastic wrapper. Actually its a toss up between that and the cheese spread that comes with the red plastic spreader thing and a few crackers. So maybe I’m not the best critic of this disgusting chef. But I’m pretty sure the only people who are gonna say they like a canapé of breast-milk cheese with figs and Hungarian pepper are either complete assholes or liars. Or both.

Also, the fuck is this guy talking about “the breast is there to make food?” The breasts are there to get free drinks at the bar and help your chances of become a Local Smokeshow of the Day. Cows are there to make milk and food, bro.