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GothamistEarlier today we saw Republicans from New York and New Jersey rip into Speaker of the House John Boehnerand his colleagues, who scrapped the $60 billion Hurricane Sandy relief bill, but those tirades turned out to be but a gentle prelude to New Jersey Governor Chris Christie’s complete evisceration of the GOP’s Congressional leadership. “There’s only one group to blame for the continued suffering of [Sandy] victims, the House majority and their speaker, John Boehner,” Christie said. “Our people were played last night as a pawn. That’s why people hate Washington DC,” Christie said, moments before breaking a live hyena in half over his knee and wiping streaks of blood underneath his eyes.

Chris Christie gives absolutely zero fucks about anything or anyone. Democrat, Republican, New York, New Jersey. Doesn’t matter. He’s probably ruining any longterm political career he ever may have had because he just keeps bashing his own party, but fuck it! Dude wants a basket of chicken fingers from Gee Gee’s and until he gets enough federal relief to make that happen he ain’t stopping. I don’t know much about politics, and I don’t know about fiscal cliffs and passing bills and shit, but all I know is if I was one of the people in Jersey who got destroyed by Sandy, I’d be pretty fuckin pumped that this is the guy who had my back.

PS – I’d like to see John Boehner tell Chris Christie to “go fuck himself” and see how that ends for him. He’d go straight up Revolting Blob on his ass. Sit on his head and kill him.