NY Post – You might have to blame yourself next time you get a parking ticket. City officials today unveiled new, streamlined signs that aim to take the guesswork out of parking regulations for befuddled motorists. The simplified signs — some of which are already up in Midtown Manhattan — feature less words, unified typefaces and more whitespace for easier reading. Most of the signs went from around 250 characters to about 140, about the size of a tweet. “I think twitter was onto something,” said Department of Transportation Commissioner Janette Sadik-Khan. The red “no standing” signs will be changed to white with red lettering. Instead of telling drivers “no standing except commercial vehicles,” the signs now say “commercial vehicles only.” It then says “others no standing.” The sign also gives the days of the week that the rules are in effect, followed by the hours. Before, the hours went first, which was too confusing, officials said. The old signs were written in all caps, which can be hard to read. The new ones are a mix of upper and lower-case lettering, similar to how most text is written.

NYC traffic signs are absolutely the fucking worst. “MON thru MON. 6PM to 5PM NO STANDING. EXCEPT FOR CARS PARKING. ALTERNATE SIDE IN EFFECT. NO PARKING.” And then theres a fucking arrow pointing one direction. Those arrows are my favorite. How far does that arrow go? Forever? Where does that arrow star?

Here’s an idea – make one electronic sign on each side of the street that changes accordingly. When you can’t park there it says “YOU CAN’T FUCKING PARK HERE UNTIL 6PM.” If you can park there it says “YOU CAN PARK HERE BUT ONLY UNTIL 6AM.” Rather than standing at the bottom of a pole reading the same words over and over again until you basically get to the point where you say “I’d rather just get a hundred dollar ticket than stand here looking stupid anymore.” Part of me thinks its just one gigantic scam by the city to confuse people just enough that they keep these fines flowing.