GainesvilleTimothy Johnson told a man to buy him drugs, then attacked him with a box cutter when the man didn’t buy enough, according to a report. Gainesville Police said Johnson, 47, who shares a common area in an apartment with the victim, told the man around 4 a.m. Saturday to go buy him drugs. The victim reluctantly agreed, but when he returned, Johnson grabbed a box cutter and cut him on the left side of his throat. The victim talked to Johnson for about a half hour before calming him down enough to toss the cutter away and leave. The man then went to a store several blocks away and called police. Johnson told police that he had been drinking heavily and had been sleeping on the couch in the common area, where he has lived for two days. As police were arresting Johnson, he threatened them and spit at one officer. Police eventually restrained him and he was arrested on charges of aggravated battery, and battery on a law enforcement officer.

Timmy Johnson shouldn’t be slicing motherfuckers’ throats with box cutters. I can’t condone that. Still, he looks like a reasonable man. Reasonable enough for me to question this story. Timmy’s roomie didn’t bring him back the appropriate amount of crack – I get it. But there’s a big difference between “not buying enough” and “poaching from someone else’s stash”. I’m sure being bullied into handling someone else’s drug deal at 4am sucks balls. Maybe you feel you’re entitled to some sort of delivery fee for the inconvenience. Timmy’s already smashed, it’s late as hell – he won’t notice if you pinch a couple tokes. Right? Well your bloody throat says otherwise, pal. Two wrongs certainly don’t make a right, but a slicing is par for the course when it comes to stealing drugs from the drunken new jack of the crack house.