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Times Tribune Scranton- Told by a doctor his liver is failing and he will need a transplant to survive, Jeremy Srebro went out Sunday night seeking stiff drinks and loose women. Instead he found a bouncer who doesn’t back down, even with a gun pressed into his chest. Mr. Srebro, 34, 1353 Pike St., and his wife, Elizabeth Srebro, walked into the V-Spot, 906 Providence Road, around 8:30 p.m., police said. The couple ordered drinks all night for themselves and for many of those around them. Mr. Srebro began to “aggressively” flirt with many of the women in the bar. Mrs. Srebro told police her husband wanted to find another woman to have a threesome. Bar patrons complained to bouncer Bernard Hartman and bartender Joe Farro. Mr. Farro told police he warned Mr. Srebro to stop a few minutes before the night got out of hand. Mrs. Srebro went to the bathroom as her husband approached another woman. Mr. Hartman intervened, informing Mr. Srebro that he had been receiving complaints. ”What are you going to do about it?” Mr. Srebro is quoted saying in the police affidavit. Mr. Hartman asked Mr. Srebro to leave. Mr. Srebro pulled a loaded Ruger handgun and pushed it into Mr. Hartman’s chest. Mr. Farro told police what happened next happened fast. Mr. Hartman grabbed Mr. Srebro’s hand and twisted the gun away while dragging him to the ground. Mr. Farro jumped over the bar and grabbed the gun once Mr. Srebro was disarmed and restrained. Mrs. Srebro told police she was not aware of what had happened until she learned police were looking for her. She told police her husband was going through a very rough time and was not in his right mind. Police charged Mr. Srebro with aggravated assault, simple assault and recklessly endangering another person. He was sent to Lackawanna County Prison in lieu of $20,000 bail. A preliminary hearing is scheduled for Jan. 21.

There has gotta be some level of Guy Code that supersedes all other rules and laws in a situation like this. Jeremy Srebro is dying, folks. Needs a goddam liver transplant or he’s dead. His time on this earth is running out. Which means his chance to do 2 chicks at the same time is running out. Any mortal man can respect 2 things – 1) The desire to fuck 2 chicks at once, and 2) The importance of accomplishing everything on your Bucket List. Now for most men, these two things go hand in hand. Big time over lap. If these things were a Venn Diagram, banging 2 chicks at once would for sure be the intersecting piece of the puzzle.

So all this bouncer and this owner needed to do was turn a blind eye. Let this guy pursue his dream before his liver failure kicks in. Ordinarily I’d understand that a guy harassing your customers can’t be permitted but here’s the X-Factor: he had his wife by his side patrolling for pussy. I mean that guy is so closeHe’s got the motivation. He’s got his wife on board. All he needs is to find a floozy at your bar and you are literally making his dream come true. Let him find some 2am orgy pussy and not only are you building up enough good karma to last a lifetime, you’ll avoid an altercation at gunpoint.

PS – If I was ever up against the clock and needed to land a threesome I would absolutely go to a place called the V Spot. The fact that Jeremy Srebro just strolled into V Spot with his wife and a gun lookin for an orgy lets me know thats one of the funnest places on earth.