Huff PoFlorida cops say Crystal Rusaw, 24, left her three children — aged 4 years, 3 years, and 10 months — at their New Port Richey home for hours on end so she could go have sex with the neighbor and sleep, WTSP reported. Worse, the kids, one of whom had soiled himself, made their way to a busy four-lane highway and crossed it alone at 5 a.m. on Sunday. The 4-year-old held the 10-month-old as they dodged traffic. A hero passerby noticed the trio and called authorities, according to ABC News. ”It could have been tragic,” neighbor Joan Miller told the station. “It’s just unbelievable.” Deputies arrested Rusaw on Saturday on charges of child neglect, Bay News 9 reports. Deputies told the station that she admitted to her crimes. The neighbor she was allegedly visiting wasn’t identified.

You know that scene in Old School when Frank the Tank is in marriage counseling and he says “deep down, I’m feeling a little confused. I mean, suddenly, you get married, and you’re supposed to be this entirely different guy. I don’t feel different.” Well I gotta imagine thats what it feels like when you have kids too, no? I mean what is Crystal Rusaw supposed to do in this situation? Bring her kids with her? That will go over like a lead balloon. Then she’d be a “Does This Look Like The Face Of A Woman Who Brought Her Kids With Her To Fuck Her Neighbor?” Is she supposed to lock her idiot kids up while she makes a booty call? I don’t think you wanna get that “I put my kids in cages” reputation.

Is she supposed to not fuck at all anymore? Thats not very fair. Pop out a couple kids and all the sudden you don’t get any more dick? Just doesn’t seem very logical. Maybe the solution is to teach your 4 year old to hold down the fort. Hey pal, you’re 4 years old. Quit shitting your pants and keep an eye on your brother and sister while mommy goes and gets some deep dicking. Stay out of traffic and if you need me my head is banging against the other side of the bedroom wall.