Some stupid website about teeth – Royal wedding fever has taken hold of everyone on both sides of the pond – but perhaps none moreso than a plumber from England named Barmy Baz Franks. Barmy recently spent £1,000 and six hours in a dentist’s chair getting Prince William and Kate Middleton’s faces tattooed on his teeth! Crafted by Dr Neil Gerrard, of the Clifton Dental Studio in Bristol, the images  were painted on by hand using ultra-fine brushes and stencils. The ‘gnasher tats’ (oh you wacky Brits) will last about three months depending on how thoroughly Barmy brushes.

People realize the Royal Family doesn’t do shit, right? They’re like the Kardashians. Don’t do a fucking thing. Just sit around being rich and good looking. And their wedding day has been declared a goddam national holiday over there. I mean whats the difference between Prince William and Manzo?

VS.

They’re both kinda funny lookin. Prince William kinda looks like Mark Teixeria. Manzo looks like a 40 Year Old Virgin. On any given day, neither of them do anything. Prince William smiles for the camera a couple times and calls it a day. Manzo puts up a blog about the Red Sox and an average looking news anchor from Connecticut and its quittin time. If you’re lucky you’ll get a Black and Yellow remix. They’re practically the same person. You don’t see Barmy Franks out there getting Manzo teeth-tattoos, do you? When Manzo got married we didn’t close the stock market, did we? Nope. We just shed a tear for the poor women who settled for him and that was it. Enough of the hoopla.

PS – The thought of a big “Manzo” tattoo has me laughing out loud to myself. Imagine if someone just got MANZO across their back? Free t shirt to anyone who gets a huge MANZO tat.