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Emmy Rossum is in the new Esquire and so I just figured I’d take the time to declare my love/lust/obsession with her. Plus I figured I had to balance things out after that guy with the giant ballsack beer gut. I spent a couple minutes pressing my face up against the computer screen trying to see her nipples behind that jacket or underneath that sweater. Which is weird because you can see her tits every week on Shameless but thats different. Thats Fiona. I see Fiona naked all the time. I see Fiona dig up dead bodies and do all that other shit the Gallaghers are always doing. This is Emmy in these pictures. Totally different. I wanna see Emmy’s tits you know? She’s a New Yorker. She’s a Mets fan. She’s perfect.

Anyway, absolute smokestack. Just thought everyone should know where I stand.

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