NYDN - Fordham University provides students with a fine and rigorous Jesuit education that “prepares them for leadership in a global society.” But it can’t seem to serve them a decent meal. The Bronx-based school, where tuition is $41,000 a year, was ranked No. 1 by The Princeton Review in the category of worst campus food. What’s not to like about a residential dining service that offer options like “Pasteurized Liquid Eggs” and “Blueberry Bagel” for breakfast? While “Cheeseburger on a Toasted Bun” sounds like a classic collegiate lunch, topping it off with “Lemon Jell-O Parfait” reeks of grade school. And then there’s dinner. “Chicago Style Hot Dog” or “Fluffernutter PBJ Club,” anyone? Recent grad McCamey Lynn said she’s not surprised by the poor rating. “The cafeteria food has been somewhat of a joke for a while,” said Lynn, 21, of Rhode Island. “Everyone loves the campus, but anyone would tell you the worst part of it there is the food.” “I’ve had friends who’ve found everything from bugs to thumbtacks in their food.”  Fordham spokesman Bob Howe said that while the ranking isn’t reflective of campus food offerings, the school will “take whatever action is necessary to address the problems with our food service program.” (Note to Fordham students: Your Bronx campus is a couple of blocks from Arthur Ave. and some of New York City’s finest Italian delis.)

FU! FU FU FU! FUUUUU! FU! When I was at Fordham our motto was “New York is my campus, Fordham is my school.” Now this year I think the University slogan is “We serve prison food with thumbtacks in it.” I figured that complaining about campus food was something every school did but apparently we were actually the worst in the whole goddam country. I mean it seems like once a year theres an article like this. And every time people say something stupid like this writer did “Hey Fordham students you live a block away from Arthur Ave and Mike’s Deli!” Yea bro I forgot! Lemme just go sit down at Umberto’s or Dominick’s for a quick lunch in between classes! Maybe instead of going to the cafeteria for a edible burger and fries like the rest of the country I’ll go drop a hundred bucks on an Italian feast at Dominicks! Because its only a block away. Idiots.

But hey at least we’re topping the country in other lists. Most expensive, bad food, bad sports! Thats what Fordham DOES!