Tough to win games when your offense is playing with 27 outs while the other guys gets 35. Sloppy night all around. Just a complete dud after Sunday’s masterpiece. It’s like Yanni got up from his seat for one second and Mac Miller stole it. Pettitte put forth a solid effort grinding it out for 7+ only to see it fall short at the hands of careless mistakes in the field and missed opportunities at the plate. On the bright side, the Yankees did exactly what they needed to do by splitting the games in Baltimore and now it’s back home. Finally away from that cesspit of bandwagon fans whose “baseball talk” probably features such gems as “make a run” and “fair pole.” Some other game 2 notes:

The Derek Jeter Fuck Up Face- See picture above.^ Same face every time Jeter fucks up in the field. Poor throw, botched pick on a short hop- doesn’t matter. It’s the “I fucked up but I’m still Derek Jeter” face. Should be a Fathead in every 12 year old’s room across the country.

Granderson and Swisher- Zero production from these 2. At least Granderson’s been consistent in sucking every at bat, whereas Swisher saves it for when it really counts with runners in scoring position. Pretty sure I saw a stat that he’s 1 for his last 33 with RISP in the playoffs. 1 hit in 33 at bats. That means that if Suzyn Waldman pinch hit for Swisher in his last 33 playoff at bats with RISP, the results would have been pretty much identical. In fact, unmouth Sterling’s balls and grab a bat, Suz, cus I’m sure there’s a decent amount of double plays from Swisher in there.

The Ichiro Slide- 

Ichiro is a playmaker. So if that was you that called for a bunt in the 7th, JOE, leading to 2 quick strikes on one of the hottest hitters on the team, JOE, you need to take one of those career aptitude tests from 3rd grade and find a new calling. Maybe something in agriculture, cus it sure as hell isn’t offensive strategizing. Down 3-2 in the 7th, on the road, you never play for the tie. That’s baseball 101.

Bottom line is this: The Yankees let one slip away last night. Who knows how that game turns out if A Rod’s liner in the first snuck through for an RBI single instead of getting snatched out of the air for a double play. If a couple grounders get fielded correctly, the team could be heading back to New York 2-0. If my grandma had a dick, she’d be my grandpa. That’s baseball; that’s life. Regroup during the off day and win 2 of 3 at home. Seems simple.