I love the arrow like, yup, right there is where your dick makes a turn due west

NY TimesIt can be painful and embarrassing for men: a disease that causes a curvature of the penis that makes intercourse difficult or impossible. Now a drug company says it may have an effective treatment. Auxilium Pharmaceuticals says that its drug Xiaflex succeeded in two late-stage clinical trials, which could put the product on a path to become the first medicine approved on the basis of solid evidence for the condition, Peyronie’s disease. In both trials, injections of Xiaflex reduced the curvature by significantly more than placebo injections, according to a news release expected to be issued by the company Monday morning. And in both trials the drug also reduced how bothered the men felt about their condition significantly more than the placebo did. The results “are not overwhelming and dramatic,” said Dr. Culley C. Carson III, a professor of urology at the University of North Carolina and an investigator in the trial. But, he added, “it’s a major advantage over what we have now, which is nothing.” Named after the French surgeon who described it in 1743, Peyronie’s disease is identified by a fibrous plaque in the penis that can cause curvature during an erection. Auxilium, which is based in Malvern, Pa., says that 5 percent of men have Peyronie’s, though estimates vary, and many men who have it are thought not to reveal that. Only a fraction of those with plaque have curvature, however. Citing medical claims data, Auxilium estimates that 65,000 to 120,000 American men receive such a diagnosis each year.

Alright first thing’s first, I took a bullet for everyone and google image’d Peyronie’s Disease to see what we’re working with. Because I don’t think I’d fix my dick if I had one of those dicks that curve upwards like a ski jump. If the G Spot exists you need somewhat of a crooked cock to hit that thing. But I looked at a handful of these pictures and diagrams and some of these dicks – we’re talking straight up right angles. 90 degrees. Like you piss around corners with these dicks. Crooked to the left, right. Up, down. Crazy.

So if I had Peyronie’s I’d be banging on the door of this clinic asking for a lifetime supply of dick straightening pills. I’m sure there are some Peyronie’s tough guys out there who try to pretend their crooked cock is a good thing. Probably claim it makes sex better with a different shape. Just like the guys who are uncircumcised who claim they like it better because your dick is more sensitive. Yea, sure thing. Whatever you say, Weird Dick. You’re grasping at straws. Its like the people who say Mark Teixeira is still worth the money because of his glove. When you gotta pick out obscure reasons to try to justify why something is good, deep down you know its not.

Bottom line is, having a strange looking dick is not a good look, no matter how you cut it. No chick wants to pull down a dude’s pants and see a “L” shaped Tetris block hanging between his legs.