NY Post – Happy hour in the city could end if Department of Health policy party-poopers go ahead with a proposal to outlaw beer and booze specials at bars and restaurants, sources told The Post. “It’s absolutely been discussed,” confirmed a department source. “It goes to show you the spirit with which they operate. Everyone is a child.” High-level conversations have gone beyond merely “throwing pencils on the ceiling and seeing what sticks,” another Health source revealed.  Sources said the happy-hour ban is being pushed by the agency’s marathon-running boss, Commissioner Thomas Farley, and is serious enough for one source to say the alcohol lobby had better find itself a good lawyer. Agency spokesman Sam Miller denied existing “plans to pursue any policy around discount-alcohol sale.” But sources said the anti-booze sentiment at the agency has reached a fever pitch, with officials recently asking state officials about the “legality of liquor in ice cream,” referring to potent products infused with bourbon, rum and tequila. A prohibition on discounted drinks is solidly in line with Farley’s goals, which he outlined in his “Take Care New York 2012” report. Farley said he aimed to “reduce risky alcohol use,” noting alcohol-related hospitalizations in 2006 were roughly 209 per 100,000 people. His goal was to reduce this number to 170 per 100,000 by this year. “DOH will advocate for policies that reduce access to alcohol by adolescents and for limits on sales practices in communities and campuses that promote drinking among adolescents and heavy drinking among adults,” the document reads.

Who tries to ban happiness? Might as well go ahead and ban Christmas and warm towels out of the dryer and brand new socks and puppies and everything else that brings people joy.

I’m not even kidding you, I think happy hour might be the most important thing in New York City. I think its what keeps the circle of life going. Every day, around 5 or 6pm, there are thousands of suicidal Cubicle Monkeys leaving work. And rather than killing themselves, they go to happy hour. Half price drinks and they drink away their suicidal tendencies. Every day, around 5 or 6pm, there are desperate women out there looking for love. They go to happy hour and find their mates. Maybe go home and make a baby. Happy hour preserves life. It creates life. It produces…happiness. You ban that and see what happens to this city. Suicides up, birth rate down. The end of New York City as we know it.