All these girls will have sex with you

NYDNEver hear the naughty limerick about “the young girl from Hoboken?” Well maybe there’s something to it: The city on the west side of the Hudson River is the eighth-most promiscuous in the country, according to a survey by an online dating website. SeekingArrangement.com polled 5,000 of its members and found 57% of those living in Hoboken said they had seven or more “friends with benefits” in a year. New York City didn’t even get close to that. The survey found it’s actually one of the least promiscuous cities, with only 15% of users saying they had seven or more partners. A typical member of the website admits to hooking up with only two to four partners a year. The site claims to have invented “the modern Sugar Daddy” and caters to wealthy men seeking “mutually beneficial relationships” with women. Its 1.7 million members rake in income of $275,000 a year, though there are no financial requirements to join, according to a spokeswoman. So if it’s not the Big Apple, what’s is the most promiscuous city of all? That would be Chicago, where 72% admitted to having no-strings-attached-arrangements with seven or more people in a year.

The ‘Boken! The 6th Borough. The hidden gem outside New York City. If Hoboken was Hoboken, NY instead of Hoboken NJ it would be absolutely perfect. If the subways ran there and cabs didn’t charge 40 bucks to cross the river into NJ there would be absolutely nothing wrong with it. Its smaller, cleaner, cheaper, quieter, more bars and restaurants than like anywhere on the planet…and apparently people are down to fuck. I don’t know about you folks but that sounds like fucking heaven.

In a weird way I think what makes Hoboken a great spot to live though, is that it is in New Jersey. You weed out all the snotty broads who think they are too good for Jersey. All the prude chicks with a stick up there ass who wanna pretend they’re living out Sex in the City. Just 14 blocks of people who are down to earth and down to fuck. Give me a Fiore’s sandwich – straight mozz and hot peppers – an apartment twice the size at half the price, and a harem of 7 or 8 bitches I fuck on the regular.

Ah who am I kidding just give me the Fiore’s sandwich and I’ll just stay monogamous with my girlfriend. The sandwich is more important anyway.