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NY PostAn investment banker and husband of a powerful Manhattan real-estate broker — who was distraught over an ongoing battle with his co-op board involving the family’s three dogs — jumped out the window of his seventh-floor Upper East Side apartment yesterday. Paramedics rushed Adam Silberman, 47, who miraculously survived the plunge, to Weill Cornell Medical Center with “multiple trauma” injuries after a 10:18 a.m. call for help, according to law-enforcement sources. Silberman was in intensive care with several broken bones, and doctors put a balloon in his aorta to head off any potential clotting, according to his wife, Monique Ender Silberman, a broker at Town Residential. The jump would have surely killed Silberman instantly if he hadn’t hit a second-floor awning, which broke his fall, law-enforcement sources said. Silberman’s father-in-law, Paul Lord Ender, said the banker had been depressed about a long-running battle with the co-op board at his swanky Fifth Avenue building at 68th Street. Neighbors of the power couple have been complaining about the pair’s dogs barking and their rambunctious play in the lobby, according to Ender and a Silberman pal. One dog had already been sent away. Ender said Silberman was beside himself with worry about his three French poodles: Prince Polo, Princess Jasmine and Prince BonbonCops found “crack paraphernalia” inside the couple’s apartment, but it was not clear whether Silberman used drugs, law-enforcement sources said. In addition to their pet woes, the Silbermans also have had some money troubles. They were hit with more than $650,000 in state and federal tax liens during the past five years, according to public records.

Look theres no doubt in my mind that a dude with French poodles named Prince Polo, Princess Jasmine and Prince Bonbon definitely has some sort of dog fetish. There’s no question the co-op board giving him a hard time about his pups definitely upset the guy. He sounds like a crazy cat lady except he’s a weirdo dog dude.

But you didn’t need to go to detective school to figure out that the rampant crack use and $650,000 worth of debt probably played just a tad more of a role in the suicide. I’m pretty sure crack addiction and debt outweigh puppy problems all day every day. I have a building that won’t allow dogs and I’m pretty bummed about it too. But it ain’t gonna make me throw myself out the window. If I was addicted to crack rocks and I also was broke as fuck, maybe my management company telling me I couldn’t have a dog would put me over the edge. Straw that broke the crackhead’s back sorta thing. But there ain’t no way thats the main cause of a suicide attempt. At the end of the day this dude probably would have sold those dogs for his next fix if he needed to. Well played, New York Post. Well played. Thats how you get people to read your articles.

PS – Failed suicide is the worst thing ever. Now you’re a dogless, moneyless addict with broken bones and a balloon in your heart. Great work, guy.