(NEWSER) – Italy’s highest court has ruled on a subject of utmost importance: whether it’s a crime to say a man has “no balls.” Its ruling? Yep, the dig is a crime punishable by a fine, because the insult makes a man feel less manly. The decision came about after years of legal battling between two cousins, one of whom (a justice of the peace) used the insult against the other (a lawyer) during a courtroom exchange, AFP reports. ”Apart from the vulgarity of the term used, the expression definitely also has an injurious quality,” said the male judge in his ruling. “It refers not only to the target’s lack of virility but also to his weakness of character, lack of determination, competence, and coherence—virtues that, rightly or wrongly, are still identified as pertaining to the male gender.”
I jump on the Italians a lot, but theres a few things they do right. They do their food right. They do their women right. And the do this shit right. They make sure men still run the world and what not. You wife stays in the kitchen and cooks. Your mistress sucks your dick. And if anyone questions your testicular fortitude, its punishable by death.
Say what you want about the Italians, but they value the literal and metaphorical value of the ballsack. Don’t fuck with my virility, my character, my determination, my competence or my coherence unless you are ready to face the consequences. Make fun of vaginas all you want but stay the fuck away from testicle talk. Its like in the Sandlot when Porter tells Philips he plays ball like a girl. Talk about bobbing for apples in the toilet and call me a butt sniffer and a scab eater but there are certain lines you just don’t cross unless you mean it.