A Stoolie called up this week posing the question “Would you rather watch only soft core porn for the rest of your life, or only minor league sports for the rest of your life?” That quickly spiraled into which profession would you rather have – a soft core porn star or a life long minor leaguer?  An thought provoking question forcing men to look themselves in the mirror and delve deep into the depths of their mind and the cockles of their heart to evaluate what kinda man you are.

Personally, I think its a no brainer. I’m taking life long minor league baseball player, hands down. Fuck, I may take life long minor league baseball player over being a professional baseball player. Your life is basically the Sandlot. Drive around the country playing meaningless baseball swinging for the fences every time you’re at the plate. Go from state to state banging local broads after every game after telling your captivating tales of life on the road just trying to live out your dreams. You know how much pussy minor league baseball players can pull telling their tales of baseball lore? Its like Field of Dreams or the Natural or some shit. Sure, you may not make a lot of money. But you live a simple life playing ball, drinking, and chasing skirts. Thats what men were put on this earth to do.

On the other hand, being a soft core porn star, while very fun in its own right, it just signing up for the ultimate cock tease. You know how soft core porn works? According to Feitelberg they put your dick in a bag of sand and tie it shut so that you don’t end up actually penetrating the chick. Your job is to lay there while some chick simulates sex basically riding your stomach instead of your dick. You fake orgasms while pretending to “make love.” Basically soft core porn is just like minor league porn when you think about it. I’d rather be in the baseball minors than the sex minors. Sure, at the end of the day when youre off the clock, soft core porn stars go home and have real sex. But so do minor league baseball players. Bottom line is playing baseball is better day job than faking sex.

PS – I’m assuming that both professions pay you absolutely nothing. If soft core porn stars are rolling in the dough, I change my mind.

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