Well here it is, people. We’ve engaged in bloody-knuckled Twitter battles for far too long without implementing a structured democratic system to determine the world’s worst commercial. So I present to you the inaugural Marketing Madness tournament. The contest will launch with hopes of finally determining the worst 30 second spot in media that makes you wonder how people get paid to come up with this shit. The tournament was originally going to be comprised of television ads only, but a late push by both stoolies and Kars4Kids itself landed the radio spot a #4 seed. For future reference, if anyone ever wants in on one of these tournaments, you sack up, summon the ability to make fun of yourself, and do what Kars4Kids did:

The social media intern for Kars4Kids is either a marketing genius or on the brink of getting fired, but either way, I love his balls. The only stipulation for a Marketing Madness entrant is that it can’t be a local commercial that is only seen in like 2 towns. I received plenty of submissions featuring toothless homeless people singing about electronics and cars, but they just weren’t universal enough.

The tournament will begin tomorrow when Bob’s Furniture squares off against Old Navy. Personally, I think Bob may have what it takes to win this thing, but that’s in your hands. Don’t sleep on Sarah Mclachlan’s stupid dog commercial either. Let the madness begin!

P.S.- I think 8 seeds is enough because I can’t trust the average stoolie attention span to hang on for longer than that, but tweet @StoolPizzaBoy with suggestions if you want more.