Marry Fuck Kill – Other ESPN Chicks
Michelle Beadle
Hannah Storm
Lindsay Czarniak
In honor of Michelle Beadle’s monkey cock picture and my newly blossoming feelings for her, I figured why not judge her in a hypothetical game of whether you would prefer to have sex, murder, or wed three different girls! I included Lindsay Czarniak because I am completely torn on her – I flip flop on her like every other day. Sometimes she’s a total smoke and other times not so much. And for our third contestant I included Hannah Storm because either she’s A) Benjamin Button or B) She sold her soul to the Devil to still look this good at her age. Either way, I’m intrigued.
Clearly I’m marrying Michelle Beadle. Like I said in that monkey dick post, she’s just got this vibe about her that I love. Doesn’t give a fuck what Erin Andrews thinks. Doesn’t give a shit about ESPN. Just wants to go out there and look good and talk sports and get fucked. Thats all I’m trying to do with my life. I’m marrying you Michelle.
As much as Hannah Storm has that “I’m a hot older broad who can fuck your dick off with 30 years of sexual experience,” I think I’m killing her. Because when I think of Hannah Storm, I think of 1995 NBA on NBC Hannah Storm:
Like a lesbian haircut and a pantsuit with shoulder pads. Laughing it up with Bill Walton and Marv Albert. She’s gotten infinitely hotter in her old age but I can’t shake this image of her from like 20 years ago.
Which leaves me to fuck Lindsay Czarniak. Hopefully its on one of her good days when I think she looks like a smoke. Otherwise I will forever regret not fucking Hannah Storm. She’ll grow to be like 90 years old and even fucking hotter and taunt me to the day I die.
Jenn Brown FTW
You know what is crazy, I think I take Sage Steele over these three. Talk about a dark horse.
Linda Cohn? Anyone? Anyone? A toothy blowie from that long face is just what the doctor ordered.
You totally forgot about Samantha Steele, potato sack city: http://www.thesportsbank.net/core/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/samantha-steele-espn.jpg
Colleen Dominguez. Absolute cougar. Google Image that shit right now.
id kill all of them and then fuck all of them. none are marriage material. now post something else asap you lazy eyed piece of shit
The fact you left out Charissa Thompson is simply egregious.
Beadle doesn’t work at ESPN anymore dumbass
Marry- Czarniak
Fuck- Sage Steele
Kill- Kevin Clancy
Pres you need to address the Doris Burke pandemic! She’s like a dead Hilary Clinton on marionette strings.
^^Maybe you should bring that up on the Boston site Einstein.
Marry Hannah Storm. Anal queen. Fuck Lindsay Czarniak. Anal queen. Kill Michelle Beadle. She’s into monkey dick anyway. Simple.
You are 100% on the money with Beadle. She’s attractive enough, and I get the vide that she’d ride me reverse cowgirl and drink beer from a beer can helmet while we watch football together on Sundays. Marry all fucking day long .
Charissa Thompson Fuck and Marry
Hannah Storm belongs in a mature MFK
sarah walsh!
Hannah is in her 40′s with multiple kids and is a smoke. You can’t pass that up.
czarniak has NO tits, beadle is a smoke who looks like a blast to hang with
Rachel Nichols?
a) Beadle isn’t an “other” ESPN chick, she is a main one along with Erin Andrews….. but she just left ESPN anyway so thats that
b) Beadle is straight fire, I’d fuck her any day
c) ESPN chicks hotter than Hannah Storm (and possible even Cznariak or however the fuck you spell her name): Jenn Brown, Samantha Steele, Colleen Dominguez, Charissa Thompson, Sara Walsh, Wendi Nix, Brienne Pedigo, Jamie Little