NEWSER) – Everyone has his or her favorite Monopoly piece … meaning some people are going to be sorely disappointed when the iconic board game loses one of its classic tokens. Monopoly is staging a Facebook contestin which players can vote to save their favorite pieces (refresher: The tokens include a race car, iron, Scottie dog, wheelbarrow, shoe, top hat, thimble, and battleship). Players also vote on which of five potential new pieces will replace the one that is removed: a cat, a toy robot, a diamond ring, a helicopter, or a guitar. After voting ends Feb. 5, a limited-edition version of the game including all of the old and potential new tokens will be released in Target stores, USA Today reports.
Let Monopoly take away the Dog and see what happens. See what fuckin happens. I’ll lose my shit. I was that kid growing up who would sit Indian Style right in the middle of the fucking board if you tried to take the Dog from me. Like fuck you mom! Be the thimble or some shit. But thats exactly whats gonna fucking happen here. This is an internet vote and all the cat freaks from the internet are gonna make sure Scottie Dog gets the boot and a cat replaces it. It will be the most devastating blow the canine family has received in the Dog vs. Cat Popularity Battle since the invention of the litter box. Dog people just lack the internet numbers to compete with these cat freaks. Go ahead and replace the Dog with a Cat, Mr. Monopoly. I’ll play Clue for the rest of my life before I ever play another roll of Monopoly.
The iron absolutely needs to get the fuck off the Monopoly board. Absolutely the worst piece on the board. At least you could stick your pinky in the mini thimble and be like “Ha, I guess thats what a thimble is.” Like nobody since the 1600s have used a thimble so in my mind its an ancient relic. A fucking iron is just an every day appliance. It would be like if a broom or a spatula or a vacuum cleaner was on the board. Stupid. The correct choice is to give The Iron the boot and replace it with a Helicopter.