Digital TrendsNestlé’s latest marketing campaign involves six chocolate bars, GPS tracking devices, a helicopter, big cash prizes and “a crack team of highly trained individuals.” Buy a chocolate bar in the UK and before you know it you could have someone knocking on your front door holding a suitcase full of cash – with your name on it. It’s all part of a competition launched by confectionary giant Nestlé. Called ‘We Will Find You’, it involves GPS chips placed inside six of its big-selling chocolate bars. Once someone opens one of the lucky bars, the chip will activate and send location information back to Nestlé, who will then despatch a helicopter to find the buyer to present them with a briefcase containing their £10,000 (about $16,000) cash prize.

Now this is how you fucking market your product. If I lived in England I fucking promise you I’d be choosing Kit Kats over Twix any time I got a candy bar. Usually thats a toss up for me. Twix vs. Kit Kat is the definition of a can’t lose situation. But only one candy bar is gonna track me down in a Black Hawk and give me 10 grand before I shit out some GPS chip that I ate. I’m assuming its inside the chocolate, right? It can’t just be the wrapper its gotta be the Kit Kat itself. So I’m envisioning a computer chip in my stomach.

Anyway thats all just logistical details. Bottom line dangling $16,000 and the chance to be swooped up by a paratrooper is a surefire way to make sure I eat Kit Kats for the rest of my life. If I can get my hands on some GPS microchips I promise you we;ll run some sort of marketing campaign where the Blackout Tour Dream Team will track you down and pick you up and bring you to the nearest Foam party.