NYDNNo news really is good news — not a single person was reported shot, stabbed or slashed in New York City on Monday, police sources said. The shutout seemingly caught the NYPD by suprise, as officials were almost at a loss to explain it. ”Nice way to start the week,” said Deputy Commissioner Paul Browne, the NYPD’s top spokesman. Neither Browne nor other officials could remember the last time a day ended with three zeros.

Well hot dog! Would you look at that! Not one MurderDeathKill this Monday. Lets pop the fucking champagne! Tossing up 3 zeroes like a its a perfect game. No runs, no hits, no errors. No shootings, stabbings or slashings. Now I’m sure there was about 10,000 bums who froze to death overnight. Not sure how many people got beat to death. I’d imagine they are still counting the bodies from Jets fan suicides. I’m sure Bloomberg has the statistics on how many people overdosed from soda and salt. But for that made up 24 hour period nobody got shot or stabbed and that big news around these parts. Stop the presses – the NYPD tossed a shutout. New York’s Finest indeed!