I have a serious question to pose for you. An average sized chick walks into a Five Guys mid-week and mid-day for a burger and fries. Obviously, the place is flooded with dudes. Are those dudes looking at her like ‘wow, that’s a really aggressive move – totally hot’… or ‘wow, seriously – that’s gross. Get that shit delivered if you want to eat it’. Also, doesn’t seem like a bad place to talk to some men – so please help. Should I go back in a month or two when I’ve burned these calories off or stay away FOREVER?
Let me emphasize by saying average size (i feel like this could go the fat route)… I got some junk in my trunk but I’m 5’5″ and I wear a size 4.
Loving me my five guys.
Let me start by tipping my cap to this Stoolie chick for the “I feel like this could go the fat route” line. That made me laugh out loud and also made me actually write this blog because my immediate gut reaction was just “You’re a fat chick” and I was gonna delete the email. But after reading the line and googling 5’5 size 4, it clear you’re a pretty normal sized chick with a big ass. Thats appealing to most dudes out there.
So the question is – what do guys think of you when you’re crushing a Five Guys burger? I think I speak for all guys when I say we don’t give a shit as long as you’re in shape. Nobody is gonna think you’re sexy if you’re polishing off a dozen wings and chowing down on a double cheeseburger. Sometimes chicks think dudes like it if you’re “one of the guys.” No. Guys like chicks. Not guys. So just be that happy medium. Dont go around being a pain in the ass only eating salad and don’t be the monster broad eating like its the last supper.
Long story short just be hot. And S my D and fix me a sandwich. I don’t care what you eat. You girls are so fucked in the head these days. Lets put an end to this 50 Shades of Grey, I’ve got a Gaggle, I’m-a-feminist-but-also-a-slut-who-eats-burgers bullshit. Just go back to being normal chicks who are a standard amount of annoying and crazy. And be thankful Five Guys even lets women in the doors.