NY Post – Awaiting the arrival of a potential beauty he met over the Internet, newly divorced Manhattan surgeon Robert Huang is sipping nervously from his drink, hoping he’ll pass muster on the cutthroat New York dating scene. Then he checks his diamond-studded Cartier gold watch (the flashy $80,000 timepiece he dug out from his drawer after the final divorce papers were signed), and instantly feels reassured. Like a growing number of singletons in the city, the 53-year-old doctor believes that expensive wrist bling is the “must-have” accessory when you’re looking for love.  “Women want to see a man as being successful and, along with upscale clothes and shoes, a good watch is an established symbol of success,” says Upper West Side-based Huang, who is seeking a “younger woman for companionship, not marriage.” “They want a man who can give them security and it highlights the fact you’re that type of guy.”  “It sounds really shallow, but younger women really fall for all that stuff,” says Wall Street trader Mike, 27, the owner of a dozen high-end watches priced between $3,000 and $12,000 each. He asked The Post not to publish his last name so that it wouldn’t get him into trouble at work. A member of the sugar-daddy-dating-service seekingarrangement.com, which matches wealthy men with women who want to be “kept,” Mike wears an $8,000 Rolex Submariner II to the office. But his customized $12,000 Breitling is definitely more effective when he’s negotiating a deal in the dating game.

Now listen I don’t want anyone to twist what I’m about to say. If you are rich and you can show women you’re rich by wearing a $10,000 watch, you will most definitely get laid. But if you need a watch to get a chick to fuck you, you got zero game. Zero. Maybe 10%. Your watch and your money do 90% of the effort and you use about 10% to close the door and actually get your dick inside of a gold digger’s pussy.

But these old ass clowns saying a Rolex is a must have if you wanna bang chicks is retarded. Reminds me of when I was in like 6th grade playing CYO hoops in the Bronx. My grandma bought me the newest pair of Jordan’s and I thought I was the cats pajamas even though I sucked. Meanwhile there was this kid from Co-Op city named O’Neil (first name, mind you) who was poor as fuck with holes in his shoes who tore it up. Guy didn’t need the bells and whistles to show his game. Just let his play do the talking. Nobody was looking at my shoes because they were too busy watching him do his thing.

Bottom line there’s like 4 steps to get laid, whether you got a watch or not:  1) Don’t be a douche 2) Don’t be arrogant 3) Be a little bit arrogant because chicks love that whether they realize it or not 4) Be funny. Emphasis on 3 and 4, mostly. Look at El Pres. Dude is unspeakably ugly and dresses like a schlub. You know the number of chicks that wanna fuck him? Its staggering. Almost makes me lose faith in the world. Why is this the case though? Confidence and humor. Aside from chicks who are just straight up gold digging, girls will always pick the charismatic guy with jokes over the wet blanket with a watch. Thats who starving artists and fat dudes sometimes end up with absolute smokes. Now, if you wanna be a funny attractive dude that also has a Rolex, more power too you. You’ll be a Dragon Slayer. Or you wanna be the guy who just keeps saying “Hey I have a Rolex” until some chick sucks your dick for that? Keep on keepin on. There’s more than one way to skin some pussy.  But you don’t need a Rolex or a pair of Jordan’s to have enough game.