Daily Mail – Underwater swimmer Hannah Fraser has been fascinated with mermaids since she was three years old. Hannah, 36, an Australian who now lives in LA, made her first mermaid tail at the age of nine, after seeing the film Splash with Daryl Hannah. Now she works as a model, actress and performer, swimming with whales, dolphins, stingrays and even sharks. Hannah can hold her breath for up to two minutes and swim to depths of 45 feet, allowing her to move like a real mermaid, without the restraints of diving gear. In these images she is seen swimming with humpback whales off Vava’u Island, Tonga, to promote marine conservation and oppose whale hunting. ‘A baby humpback was curious and actually came up to me,’ said Hannah. ‘The whales were singing so loudly and the baby whale was squealing, which sounds even louder under the water. It was a very powerful experience.’ In 2009, Hannah swam in her tail with 14ft Great White Sharks off Guadalupe island, Mexico. ‘I thought if I was going to be a professional mermaid I’d have to face my fear of sharks,’ she admitted. I got my tail on and got into the water. I was supposed to be surrounded by divers, but in the mermaid tail I swim much faster than anyone else. I realised I was on my own, but I stayed calm.’ She added: ‘Another time a shark turned round and came towards me, so I made a scary face and screamed at it in the water. Amazingly I scared it off. I felt invincible for months afterwards.’
Mermaid? More like MERSMOKE? Am I right? No wonder the baby humpback was curious and swam up to you. Probably wanted to fuck you with his big old whale dick. All the other whales were singing because they were chanting “SHOW YOUR TITS” in whale speak. I mean this is probably the 2nd hottest mermaid in existence behind Ariel. Granted those are the only 2 mermaids ever so thats technically last place, but whatever. Bottom line is if you wanted to sell your voice to an underwater witch to get a nice pair of legs and come fuck me on dry land, I wouldn’t be opposed to it.
Although we’re gonna have to work on your career if you wanna get down with me. See, I only deal with sugar mamas. So you’re really gonna have to dominate the professional mermaid industry. I’d have to imagine a pro mermaid needs to be able to hold her breath for more than 2 minutes. I’m pretty sure when I was like 13 I could hold my breath for like 90 seconds and I was still am amateur merman. If you wanna be the best mermaid in the game you gotta hold your breath for like 5 minutes and be able to go at least 100 feet deep. And you better have a set of pipes on you. I know, its not fair. But what can I say? After that bitch Ariel people are gonna expect your underwater ass to sing. Now do me a favor and cue the motherfuckin music!
You want thing-a-ma-bobs? I got 20.