God I hate Yankees Fans

Is there a word for that? When something is so shocking and improbable but at the same time you absolutely expect it to happen? Because thats exactly what I, and every other Yankee hater, was thinking last night. I mean what were the chances, right? What were the chances this entire Arod batting slot fiasco began in the first place? That right there was a storyline years in the making created by the media and fans. Arod should go 2-4 game 2 and theres no way his spot in the lineup is even in jeopardy. But a snagged line drive robs him from a hit and we have ourselves a lineup controversy. What are the chances Arod is up again in the 9th? Up again in the 9th down 2-1 against a team that is 75-0 when leading after 7 innings. Facing a right handed pitcher so Binder Joe can use a righty-lefty excuse to bench Arod and put in Raul Ibanez in case the move doesn’t work out. What are the chances Ibanez parks one in place of one of the greatest of all time the exact same game people question whether he even deserves to be there in the first place? And then what are the chances he does it again 3 innings later in the same exact fashion for the win against a team that was 16-2 in extra innings?

Well the chances of that happening for the Yankees are roughly between 400 and 500%. Because Thats Baseball Suzyn. Thats Yankees baseball, Suzyn. First thing I said when Ibanez stepped up was “This is the last guy I wanna see” and the second time around it was “You better not throw him any fastballs” and both times he comes through and steps directly onto my ball sack. You can see the stars aligning, you can see the Hollywood script being written as the game unfolds, and you know exactly how its gonna end. And the sickest part of all is that its plain as fucking day when its about to happen to people like me, and diehard Yankees fans are ready to plan their call to WFAN tomorrow to bash this team for not being clutch. Can’t tell you how many Yankees fans I saw on twitter and facebook and shit giving up on this team in the late innings only to turn around with “RAUL! #TrueYankee!” “RAUL! #EarnedHisPinstripes” garbage. How can you fucking assholes not be used to this by now? How can you not expect it? From Leyritz to Brosius to Boone to Ibanez with guys like Jeffrey Maier this has happened a million times before. Its so goddam obvious when they’re about to do it again and yet every single it crushes my soul. Makes it that much darker and more bitter as I watch 50,000 spoiled scumbags get to celebrate Yankees magic again for the 60th time.

PS – I feel bad for Arod at this point. I really do. Watching him celebrate the 1st home run was actually a pretty stand-up moment for him. Really was just happy for the team. But that second home run, somewhere deep down in his heart, you know was just a dagger. Guy steps in and is 2 for 2 with two of the most amazingly clutch home runs ever and just solidifies that he’s never gonna be loved by the fans. Ever. $300 million and a 2009 World Series ring he earned all by himself and he still can’t buy the one thing he wants and thats acceptance.