The Barstool Bowl
VS
The biggest matchup in Barstool history. A game that El Presidente has formally said he will kill himself if the Patriots lose. A game that could send Old Man Thornton into cardiac arrest. Potentially dozens of stupid T shirt designs on the line. Will it be Duckboats or the Canyon of Heroes? FOR GOD’S SAKE WHICH BLOG WILL GET TO CUE THE MOTHERFUCKING MUSIC???
It could change the landscape of Barstool Sports as we know it. Fuckin Feitelberg may have the keys to the empire up there in New Englang if Pres and Thornton kick the bucket. Pats fans you’re not just rooting for revenge on the football field. You’re rooting for continued control of the Barstool Empire. I mean, what will the New England commenters do if the Giants win? The entire Pats dynasty would be completely nullified in the eyes of New Yorkers if they were 0-2 against Eli and the Giants. Jets commenters will be back in the mix talking shit from the sidelines, able to continue their “The Patriots haven’t won a Super Bowl in a decade” routine. Boston fans will have to turn to their pathetic hockey defense where they’ll say “Stanley Cup > Lombardi Trophy” even though we know thats not true.
This one is for all the Barstool marbles. There’s no sugar coating it. Pres is shook. Pats fans are shook. They know if the Pats play like they did against the Ravens, they’re fucked. And the Giants are kinda playing with house money. Its 2007 all over again, except this time Barstool New York is in the mix. Interweb Supremacy just one of the many subplots of Super Bowl 46.
KFC get the fuck out. let the real fans handle this
And, as usual, no one cares about Philly.
Pats fans are shook. Thats why prez is still posting about the Ravens. He “sneaky” knows that there is just no way the Pats can cover Nicks, Cruz and Manningham. If the Giants can put mobile guys like Rodgers and Smith on their ass, imagine what the pass rush will do to old man Brady. Oh boy!
I feel bad for the Giants, I really do. You are aware that this is the Bradichick Revenge Tour, right? 2 birds with 1 stone in 13 days. The Pats won’t be anemic against the Giants like they were against the Ravens. It’s going to be a shootout, and Brady is out for revenge. For blood. Every member of the ’07 squad that had to suffer in the Super Bowl That Shall Not Be Named wants this. This time, however, they’re not just playing for themselves and the fans. They’re playing for Myra Kraft. This season is for her, and if you think the Pats are going to lose, you’re insane. The MHK patches on their uniforms mean something to them. They will leave nothing on the field other than the confetti from their inevitable Super Bowl XLVI win. It feels so much like destiny.
Seriously KFC, stay the fuck out of this. I’d rather read shitty blogs from Scott then a Jet’s fan trying to ride the coattails of the Giants success. This game means nothing to you. Go back to writing about the Jets or Mets and leave it for the real fans. This is why everyone hates new york sports fans, because of chumps like you.
It’s gonna be a bloodbath
Tom Brady has had a more successful postseason career than the entire Jets franchise in its history so shut the fuck up KFC and all other Jets fans
Even as a Pat fan, Barstool is going to be unbearable for the next 2 weeks. Every commenter and their mother will be here making bold predictions that they know they will never be held to unless they end up being correct. I’m looking forward to an all-time classic game, and that’s about it.
psssstt. the decade is over. its a new one.
totally different team. No over confidence, Pats are going in scrapping for everything.
its going o be a war! its going to be fucking awesome!
%u201CThe Patriots haven%u2019t won a Super Bowl in a decade%u201D routine
Bro the fucking jets havent won/been to a superbowl in 43 yrs. Shut the fuck up and suck bradys dick bitch
We really can’t lose. If we win in two weeks the Pats are the Super Bowl winners. If we lose in two weeks we can use Jet logic and still declare the Pats Super Bowl winners because they went to the AFC Championship game…..oh wait is it a rule that you have to lose the AFC Championship game before you declare yourself World Champs or is just getting there enough? I hate the technicality of actually winning to get in the way.
This truly is the most instrumental two weeks in the history of barstool sports. it is doomsday. judgment day for both teams. this game is special because it truly will crush either fan base and leave them with nothing to come back with if their team loses. this is the ownership game. there will be nothing left after this game.
Both games decided by world class fuckups, two statistically average teams in the final
Mediocre Bowl XLVI
for a jet fan, this is pretty solid KFC. must have been tortuous to write this, so props to you my loser friend.
New England fans: Kiss my ass and suck my dick. You don’t have a leg to stand on if you’re trying to argue that the Pats are going to win. You are all giant faggots.
Evil One… who would you have in the Super Bowl then?
I wonder how Eli’s ass feels today after being absolutely raped by the D last night.
Do Giants fans really think they have a shot? Over here In New England, we recognize our franchise is better than yours will ever be. Let’s be honest here, this year’s Super Bowl has nothing to do with the Giants what-so-ever and everything to do with how Brady plays regardless of coverage. Brady can pick up apart your defense if he decides to show up, which he will. New England has something to prove. 18-1 means nothing, it’s all about this year. At the end of the day, Brady will have 4 rings and all three Manning’s combined (pathetic whiney bitches) will have two (Eli with only 1). You all act like our defense is garbage and although it isn’t the strongest we will still whip your ass and make your faggot ass coach cry for the millionth time in front of the media. JPP (Just Pounding Penis) aint got shit, Cruz is a Umass graduate (pfffff…..sweet deal) and on top of it all, you guys are too stupid to even give the correct name to your teams. The Giants play in Jersey dipshits, your all a bunch of Jersey trash. Were gonna stomp your ass out, end of discussion….3-1 odds Coughlin cries like a pussy after the game. Three Mannings one cup.
so BarDown will you do everyone a favor and if the giants win legitimately just fucking kill yourself.. you sound like that fat fuck clown rex ryan with all these guarantees youre throwing down.. so if the patriots lose douse yourself in gasoline and light yourself on fire.. you dont have a job breaking down sports because everything you said is fucking stupid and is just wrong
“JPP (Just Pounding Penis) aint got shit, Cruz is a Umass graduate (pfffff…..sweet deal) and on top of it all, you guys are too stupid to even give the correct name to your teams”
Just when I thought boston fans couldnt get any dumber, BarDown2213 mutters this unbelievable gem.
they already are 0-2 vs the giants, anybody recall week 9