Foreground – Yes. Background – No.

Itty bitty book reading committee

I’m in love with this nerd in a thong

I take it back, I’m in love with this one. Loving gravity in this picture.

The potential for all these chicks to just put down their books and do one of those lesbian oral sex trains is titillating.


Village Voice Back in June, when it was sultry and sunny on the city streets, there was a woman who walked the Bowery topless. Some were shocked, as people sometimes are; others responded coolly, knowingly that, actually, it is legal to be topless as a woman or a man in New York City. Still others were inspired to try it for themselves. And then, we all pretty much put our shirts back on and went about our business, except for a group known as the Outdoor Co-Ed Topless Pulp Fiction Appreciation Society. After a first meeting on August 17, they are still going topless as they read pulp fiction outdoors in various New York City locales. They are hoping to take female toplessness from “something taboo,” albeit legal, to something that people don’t much notice, or care about if they do.

Remember when you were a kid and they tried everything under the sun to try and make reading seem cool? Book fairs and shit. Remember Scholastic News where you picked books out of those newspaper things? All those books that were on a retarded kid’s reading level like Goosebumps and Hardy Boys and Matt Christopher Books. Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark. All that crap. Just fuckign begging kids to put down the Nintendo sticks and pick up a book.

What a fucking waste of time all that was. They shoulda just had naked bitches sitting in a circle doing Popcorn and your boy KFC would have been reading Great Expectations by the time he was 9. When your summer reading list includes porno books and all the sluts of the neighborhood will read them out loud to you with their funbags out you better believe reading is fundamental. Silent Sustained Reading would have been my favorite part of school. Book reports? Bring em on. Because in the Topless Appreciation Society, books = boobs. And in case you didn’t realize, there’s a direct negative correlation between a young man’s love for boobs and a young man’s love for books. Its like there can only be one inside the mind and heart of a boy in puberty. Either you love tits and you become cool and dumb, or you love books and you become a nerd who’s smart. But topless sluts reading books combines these two. We could have a whole generation of nerds who get laid and cool kids who can get jobs other than being a blogger. The Topless Appreciation society could revolutionize the world.