So Andy Roddick’s illustrious mediocre career is coming to an end after the US Open. So naturally its breaking news on ESPN and twitter explodes and yada yada yada. Andy Roddick stinks, folks. He won one major his whole career. The rest was a bunch of quarterfinals exits every time. He made a living off of being “the best American” when every American tennis player sucked.
But obviously Andy Roddick is one of the biggest winners on the whole planet because he landed a bombshell SI model as a wife. Took one US Open and turned it into Brooklyn Decker. Greatest achievement since Jesus turned water into wine. So here’s the question – and we’re going to go out on a completely unrealistic and fantastical limb and we’re going to assume monogamy. No cheating is allowed. You’re only allowed to fuck your wife in this scenario:
Would you rather be Federer or Roddick?
I don’t now tennis all that well but I’m pretty sure Roger Federer is considered the greatest of all time. If not number 1 than like top 3 or top 5. Mentioned in the same breath as Tiger and Jordan and the elitest athletes that have ever walked the planet. Dominated his sport in his prime as well as anyone ever has. A billion majors, endorsements for days. Problem is he’s married to this:
Frumpy doesn’t even begin to describe this chick. Queen Frumpy.
Obviously on the other hand, Andy Roddick is now married to the original Kate Upton. Before Upton there was Decker. A blond with massive tits and a curvy body on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Only difference is Decker didn’t do the Dougie and didn’t tease the world with her massive sex appeal so Upton shot right by her.
So whats the verdict? Do you want the trophies or the trophy wife? The most glory or the best glory hole? Sports immortality or Cocksmen Hall of Fame? Who ya got:
Vote 1 for Roddick and his wife Vote 10 for Federer and his tophies