NYDN – Mark Zuckerberg is no longer a top 40 hit. With Facebook shares floundering since the social-networking company went public, the 28-year-old CEO dropped off the list of the world’s 40 richest people Tuesday, according to the Bloomberg Billionaires Index. Zuckerberg’s monetary worth was pegged at $14.7 billion Tuesday, down from $16.2 billion on May 25, Bloomberg reported. In that time, the price of shares dropped 9.6% to $28.84. “It seems to be a clear reflection that there was just too much stock issued, that the valuation was aggressive and that a lot of people who lined up to buy it really had no intention of holding it,” Jack Ablin, chief investment officer of BMO Harris Private Bank in Chicago, told Bloomberg on Tuesday.
What a week Zuckerberg had, huh? Dude lost 2 billion dollars and married an ugly broad. I don’t care how many billions you still have, thats a rough fuckin week. Like yea I’m not losing sleep over Zuckerberg’s life right now, but I’m just saying there are certain things as a human that will always suck no matter how awesome your life may be. Losing a couple billion and hitching your wagon to an ugly Asian are both on that list of things. Its like stubbing your toe or biting your lip. No matter how rich and famous you are, that shit still makes you wanna kill yourself.
I mean as far as I’m concerned the last 2 weeks of my life have been better than Zucks. I’m having sex with a girl whos hotter than his old ball and chain and I actually earned some cashflow. How bout that, you fucking smug son of a bitch! Zuckerberg is probably updating his facebook status right now “You know whats cooler than losing 2 billion and marrying an Asian? Being KFC from Barstool New York.” Me and the Winklevoss Twins are gonna hit the town and get shitfaced and party like true ballers who didn’t lose billions in ten days. And we’re gonna update our Twitter statuses the whole time.